I think that I've had my very first Anxiety Attack, after I've finnished my Dinner, this Evening. I knew that something wasn't quite right, as I was eating. I was almost in a Ball and I was avoiding Eye-Contact with my Parents. Than I've gotten up and started to dry the Dishes. I was standing there in a Daze with my Heart racing, Tempature rising, Body shaking, Face turning Red, I was having Hot and Cold Flashes at the same time. I was feeilng dizzy and it was almost as though I was looking at 2-D Images through a Viewmaster. Than all that I could see, were Gold and Silver Specks, the size of Periods. My Family isn't a very open Family. I can't say anything about my Obsessions when my Dad is around. I feel that I'm not even allowed to breath around him. I can't blink or yawn, even though none of that is really true, but that how I feel, when I'm being hushed by my Mom, every time that I mention anything about London, when my Un-Educated Dad is around. I wasn't even going to mention words that have anything to do with London. I was trying to speak in Code, when I was showing my Mom the reciept towards a Knick-Knack of a Routemaster beside a Building and I was hushed. Than I was seeing my Dad as The Enemy all through Dinner, because he doesn't even care to do his Research, and that he thinks that all people with "Problems" are "Slow" and that's final. I'm average, or above in Intelligence, and I'm not the Loser that he makes me out to be, and my Obsessions are very real, but he doesn't get it. I feel like I can't even make a mistake, while breathing around him. This could get me out of the house, in a hurry, before I'm ready. I feel like a Bloody 10 year old around my Parents. Things sure haven't changed between us, since Bleeding 1985.
Last edited by CockneyRebel on 14 Jul 2006, 8:29 am, edited 1 time in total.