Why couldn't I have been born a boy?

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Sometimes I wish I wasn't a girl so I wouldn't have to worry about being a model in order to be considered beautiful. No matter how smart I am, men will never appreciate me. I will never get paid the wages I deserve and I will always be the victim of the patriarchical society I live in. If I were a man, life would be so much better. I'd get the money I deserve, all the clothes I need are shirts and pants, it's okay to be a little heavy because guys aren't expected to be light. I wouldn't have the pressure of being attractive all the time. I wouldn't have to deal with misogynists telling me that my purpose in life is to make babies, suck dick and make sandwiches. Men are so lucky. If you're a girl who isn't pretty, then you're completely worthless. I hate how shallow Americans are.

I'm not saying I'm transgendered. I just wish I was born into the sex my society prefers. I'm worthless as a girl so why was I allowed to live as long as I have?

And if someone tries attacking me in this thread, I'll report them immediately because somebody felt the need to attack me in the last thread I made in the Haven because she didn't like me. :/

okay, YOU'RE NOT worthless. i'm sorry if society is treating you badly, but if you feel this is the case then it is your job to prove them wrong. Society needs people like you who can prove that you don't need to be a model to be beautiful, that you don't need to be male to be powerful.

If anyone throws a misogynistic comment at you, then it is your job to stand up to them. Tell them they are wrong, and explain why. Furthermore, I've found that not appearing shallow helps people to focus on intelligence. By giving in to society's views that you need to objectify yourself, other people will not take you seriously. I've found that dressing modestly and not having a flashy appearance helps people to focus on my intellect and not my body.

If anything, knowing society is like this should make you feel EMPOWERED. It's good to know that you are better than that. You're ahead of the curve. You've realized that you don't need to objectify yourself to feel good about yourself. You don't need to "make" yourself beautiful; you already are. Furthermore, the stick-thin model has been photoshopped into oblivion and most likely has huge self-esteem issues, as well as a possible eating disorder, as her whole life centers around her appearance. I hope she is able to realize what you've realized.

American society is flawed; so what? In this case, it is the duty of smart, educated women like you to prove that there is more to life than pumping out babies and being a slave to men.

By being the exception to the so-called rule, you can command respect. The higher pay will come with time, as will the self-respect once the men in your life realize that you are their equal. The rest of society is blind for feeling they need to give in to these perceived ideals of what gender roles are supposed to be.

If you have issues with society, then you should do what you feel is right. Maybe you will inspire someone along the way.

If you want to talk about anything specific, I'm here. I've been there. The best thing is having a friend to listen, so let me know if you need someone to listen to you.

Uh-huh, I hope you're not being serious.

From my PoV as a boy this seems a bit like a bad case of "grass is greener". I don't think we're gonna get anything out of debating who has it easier, but i will say i think it's a pretty gross denial of the truth to claim men aren't judged for their looks.
Anyway, why don't you tell us what episode brough these feelings on instead, it's a pretty general lashing out.
What happened to keeping up faith and working on losing weight a little at a time?
Wish i could say more to help, but it's not gonna do much good to open up the "boys have it easier" can of worms.

Anyway sorry my gender opresses your gender.

On a very serious note, why would u give up multiple orgasms?

It sucks that people can't follow the basic rules of The Haven. I'm sorry someone attacked you when this is the last place such a thing should happen.

I know you're not the only one who feels the way you feel. Your frustrations at systematic sexism are well-shared by a large population of women. It can seem hopeless and overwhelming.

However, you're not worthless in this society. I'd argue the premise that you're unattractive because I'm part of the hundreds who think you're adorable and it's partly because of the weight. I don't think you'd be as beautiful if you were twiggy thin. Anyway, big girls who have an education and a career can make a very solid impact, especially in management. I know a woman who is 5ft even. She's over 200lbs. She used to be under 100lbs when she was 19, but through and after a nasty divorce, she gained weight and she realized that people responded to her more positively as a fat woman. People noticed when she spoke. Nobody treated her like a child. People did what she told them to do. She's now in charge of an entire hospital and aiming higher in the corporation. She wouldn't lose weight for all the world.

There is the systematic sexism, but you can plow through that to succeed. I don't know if you'll ever be desensitized to it since it's a completely BS thing to have to put up with, but you're better than the limitations that society put on to you and can overcome them.

i never thought like that before. i would paraphrase james may that all you're really doing as a man is keeping sperm warm.

but all i can say is, do u want a hug?


its not really my place to say, but if a guy only likes someone "cos theyre hawt" - then they're probably an asshat anyhoo.

You'll get there. I know you will. One step at a time is the only way to do it.

As far getting a man... who cares. I mean, I'm not going to lie to you, back in the day I was sexy-looking and men thought I was hawt and I thought that was cool when it was happening, but it didn't gain me anything more than some d*ck, which is not a commodity that is worth anything, really. You don't even get to keep it since it's attached to someone else and most of the time you don't want to keep what it was attached to.

Craig Fergusson said:
"I like a woman with some weight on her. There's a name for guys like me. Do you know what it is? HETEROSEXUALS."

Stay away from the text-speaking idiots. They aren't men. They're male but those are not real men. If you seek respect from those unable to respect themselves, you'll be disappointed every time. With the license and the job and the car and the independent life, you'll be placed into a new world where there are mature self-sufficient people. While there's always sexism and fatphobia floating around like mold spores because our society is dank enough to cultivate it, the ratio of Idiot to Man will change in your favor. You'll find gentlemen pursuing you who are attracted to your body, brains and ambition.

I just wish I was a guy so I don't have to deal with guys checking me out and I obviously wouldn't have a period .

I hear ya! I've had not one, but two employers give me crap over having a baby while working for them. Misogyny is alive and well in the American workplace. BUT, now I'm working for myself. There were other issues with my AS that hindered me from optimally advocating for myself in those situations, but still, there are ways to get around the heaps of doo-doo society leaves in our path if you apply your intellect to it. Hang in there

~Kate