keira wrote:
Sowlowsolo wrote:
Feeling so so worthless. Asking why in gods name was I ever born? What can I do that will make any difference?
I can't see any point in anything anymore. It's all a joke - a bad one! I'm soooooo tired I want to sleep for the rest of time =[ =[ =[ =[
I am very sorry you feel this way and I wish I could say something to make you feel better but I'm really bad at things like that and I doubt words could actually help.
When I get into these pitch black emotional holes I keep reminding myself that everything in life changes and everything eventually ends. That means that these unbearable feelings will end too and something different, something better will take their place. I know that it may not console you and you may not believe it at this moment but those are the facts. Try to remember that probably you've already gone through some hard times in your life before and maybe those times don't seem as dark as the place you're in now, still you survived it. That means that you will survive this as well and you will get better and stronger.
I really hope and wish you would not give up on yourself.
Best wishes.
Thank you for taking the time to post Keira - here are my thoughts for what they are worth.
You are not bad at words - but in fact you are right - I find words don't help. I wonder what the world would be like without them? I don't know the answer of course.
Everything does change and end. Do they change for the better? I honestly don't have much experience of this.
My parents devorced, my step dad tried it on with me, my mum didn't believe me, my mum has never been happy, my dad wants to get to know me now after 30 years absent (do you suppose he would like to know that I'm suicidal and broke?), my sons father stole from me and told me lies, I had to bring my son up on my own with no financial support from his father though I never stopped him from seeing his son, a man I loved very much couldn't stay in the relationship, My hair has gone wierd, my teeth are damaged and repairs will be costly, my home is in need of much repair, I'm working more hours than ever before and have less money left to call my own, My job is (I can't find words to describe it), I have been on 4 holidays in all my adult life (only 2 abroad), I don't enjoy food much anymore (which is just as well because it's too expensive anyway), I can't be arsed to put the TV on, I'm very tired.
Good things end - bad things, well, they seem to go on and on!