Same aged psychologists/psychotherapists?

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techstepgenr8tion
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13 Feb 2012, 5:56 pm

Got a quick question about something. I've started a search again for a psychologist/psychotherapist to talk to about some recent issues I feel like I'm kind of stuck in. I do have some former psychologists I've worked with, all who are great guys but none of whom I really get the sense are equipped to help me on what I'm dealing with at present.

As I looked around my area and started narrowing in by prospect (ie. their training, leanings in what they like to work with people on, etc.) I noticed that a couple of my stronger prospects are both female and within a couple years of my age. Part of me thinks that this would be a good thing; mainly that they're the same age thus likely have plenty of friends dealing with the same life issues I am, perhaps even have dealt with it themselves. Also, admittedly, having a psychologist/patient relationship with someone that close to my age, especially female, would also be quite aggressively getting into the mechanics of some of my own fears, social phobias, etc. and *hopefully* carving up some old programming from my teens and twenties that I just don't want to be carrying with me anymore but have had no real means to resolve, not to mention that they may have some additional helpful input on things that people outside of that sort of 'antagonistic' zone wouldn't be able to see or provide.

My question is: has anyone ever, especially at my age, seen a psychologist around their same age? Was it weird for either you, the psychologist or both? I want to get a sense of things from other people who've been down that path while I'm reviewing my prospective candidates just to see whether I'd want to include these two as strong possible candidates or whether it would be wiser to pass on them for that reason.


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TeaEarlGreyHot
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13 Feb 2012, 6:05 pm

I saw a male psych about 3 years ago that was within a few years of my age. I found it very uncomfortable, and didn't go back to him after the initial appointment.

I wasn't uncomfortable because of his gender or age, though. There was something off-putting about his approach towards me. Admittedly, this could have had to do with his age and/or gender. I have had male psychs before, but never one around my own age. I'm not sure I'd want to again.

But then, the issues I was seeing him for may have been the cause of my discomfort.


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OliveOilMom
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13 Feb 2012, 6:18 pm

Several years ago I saw a boy who was about ten years younger than me. He was good, and he did great therapy. We got along fine. I would have to say that my best therapist was a lady who was about fifteen years older than me who had gone through the exact same problem that I was having, which is why she specialized in it. We ended up becoming friends after therapy ended. We still talk sometimes, but not therapy talk. Just talk talk.


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DJRAVEN66
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13 Feb 2012, 7:21 pm

if i were to go back to that sort of therapy agin i would want someone that is 15-20 years older than me and im 25 by the way.



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13 Feb 2012, 8:47 pm

The best therapist I've had was young and a practicing student. She wasn't stuck on what she should do, and didn't push me too much or patronize me (issues I've had with other, older therapists).



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14 Feb 2012, 8:40 am

I would say it is situational. They might be the same age, but feel older. They could even be younger.

The key is what you feel about the person, and whether you get good work done.

Personally, I've always been in the 'age ain't nothing but a number' camp.

I guess the older you get, the less options you have for seeing an older person.


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techstepgenr8tion
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14 Feb 2012, 8:50 am

Moog wrote:
Personally, I've always been in the 'age ain't nothing but a number' camp.

I guess the older you get, the less options you have for seeing an older person.

I think at worst, if someone's really new to a field, the odds of going past their area of expertise hypothetically increase but I'd agree with you that there are also tons of people out there with 30 - 35 years experience who can dabble in a bit of this and a bit of that but are lost on really high-level or more complex issues, then you have other people who could be twenty-five or thirty and, well, just had more mental carrying capacity and accuity from birth.


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techstepgenr8tion
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14 Feb 2012, 9:36 am

I guess it might be worth sharing a bit of info here to give this a bit more context. Mainly its the transition from 20's to 30's and the sort of 'self-bleed' that happens once a lot of what you've had your identity riding on prior to that hits a wall and gets stripped out from under you. I think I'm primarily looking for life-coaching to broach new directions but at the same time I'll be looking for someone who at least has an accurate enough concept of ASD where it wouldn't throw them for a loop.


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TeaEarlGreyHot
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15 Feb 2012, 4:02 pm

That can happen before you hit your 30s. Though, I admit I'm only a year away from 30 so maybe my point is moot.


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techstepgenr8tion
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15 Feb 2012, 4:09 pm

TeaEarlGreyHot wrote:
That can happen before you hit your 30s. Though, I admit I'm only a year away from 30 so maybe my point is moot.

Oh, I completely agree. I suppose I wasn't trying to set an age minimum on it, I figure though its bound to happen the most to people under 40, after that it seems like the numbers of undiscovered pivots a person's self-awareness can take starts shrinking.


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TeaEarlGreyHot
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15 Feb 2012, 4:25 pm

I'm curious how you think seeing a psych might help? I know many people see one when they hit the mid-life crisis, but I've yet to understand exactly how it helps.


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techstepgenr8tion
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15 Feb 2012, 4:35 pm

Its really just seeing if you can find someone one who can go over the details of you, your life, and then possibly offer some thoughts, ideas, input, or even motivation that's just not there in your environment. Even if you have a supportive environment it could be an environment that's a bit idea-barren, the support might be little more than passive, and in a sense you might not be getting the inputs you need to sort of draw things into sharper focus.

I think that's what I'm looking for and in a sense I'm veering toward talking to a psychotherapist not only close to my age but who's presence and personality isn't going to be a replica of some part of the echo chamber that I feel like I'm stuck in. In a sense I'm looking much more for a life coach than a therapist just that, since AS and certain things I have to deal with inexorably with the world are part of the walls and structure of my own landscape I do need someone with at least enough background in psychology, psychotherapy, etc.. to be able to take those things into the blue-prints just to make more accurate suggestions than if they didn't have that sort of schooling.


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