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Losing my mind...

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AceOfSpades
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17 Feb 2012, 10:59 am

I've been able to keep my suicidal thoughts at bay for a while but they have been coming back to me. I can't shake the fact that life itself is disturbing and hard to make sense out of. Everything seems so hazy and out of place. I've struggled with low self-esteem, insecurity, and paranoia for as long as I can remember and I'm just tired of trying to find meaning in it all. I don't mean finding meaning as in soul searching but finding meaning as in trying to have a basic idea of it which I can't even do. I fear that I'm slowly losing my sanity and getting closer and closer to my breaking point. I feel like I hardly know who I am or who anyone else is. I can't predict how I or anyone else would act or think because I can't separate what's supposed to define me entirely and what's simply supposed to be only a little part of who I am so it's even harder when it comes to other people. It always feels like I'm stuck with having to react to unexpected problems with no warning so I just feel like I'm reacting to everything rather than actively living my life. How do I make sense out of it all?



questor
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17 Feb 2012, 12:00 pm

You need to stop focusing on, and dwelling on, your thoughts and problems so much. It turns into a bottomless pit with a whirl pool in it, that is hard to get out of.

What you need to do is to find things to keep your hands and mind occupied, such as:

- Listen to and/or play music
- Read
- Exercise
- Hobbies
- Volunteer/charity work
- Watch TV
- Surf the I-net
- Join clubs/other activities
- Humor--from books, TV, I-net, life, etc.--Laughter is supposed to be the best medicine.

I'm sure you can think of more I've left out, but do get involved with stuff to keep you occupied. I know it helps because I have been in your situation, and I find keeping occupied helps a lot.


_________________
If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer.
Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured, or far away.--Henry David Thoreau


AceOfSpades
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17 Feb 2012, 12:17 pm

questor wrote:
You need to stop focusing on, and dwelling on, your thoughts and problems so much. It turns into a bottomless pit with a whirl pool in it, that is hard to get out of.

What you need to do is to find things to keep your hands and mind occupied, such as:

- Listen to and/or play music
- Read
- Exercise
- Hobbies
- Volunteer/charity work
- Watch TV
- Surf the I-net
- Join clubs/other activities
- Humor--from books, TV, I-net, life, etc.--Laughter is supposed to be the best medicine.

I'm sure you can think of more I've left out, but do get involved with stuff to keep you occupied. I know it helps because I have been in your situation, and I find keeping occupied helps a lot.
It helps when it comes the breaking the cycle of dwelling on my problems but all it really does is keep my demons at bay rather than address them so it's not really a long term solution. I can't keep that up forever so at some point I'm going to have to find an answer.



Greatsharkbite
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17 Feb 2012, 1:57 pm

Yeah, life is pretty confusing. If you're someone who lives casually.. you do every meaningless thing that you can to have fun to try and ignore the ground rotting underneath your feet.

Everything is perception--so much freedom you can't even fully process all of your options in a single life time.

I mean but you pick your own reason to live, you decide with what knowledge you have and make the best decisions out of the choices you're given. Have fun.. do the things that personally give you joy in life.

As long as you're around, you can still ask the questions that are on your mind, find out who you are, find meaning, help others in your situation, etc. But if you're not around, any hope for that goes away.