I feel invisible

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I feel invisible most times. Anytime I try to make talk with anyone like at school, no one seems to care. My conversations just don't appear important to them. If I were to vanish amid such a conversation, I doubt very much I'd be missed. I'm hoping I fit in here. I had surfed around this site before joining and noticed how so many times people respond to others' comments. I was expecting the same, but so far I haven't got near the feedback I'd hoped for. But I don't want to be begging for it either, only if people really want to respond to me. I hate false acts. There have a been a few feedbacks, like when I posted to the Haven a few days ago, and on a few threads perhaps I have posted to. But I've made some posts I really thought someone might want to talk to me on. I feel childish for even bringing this up, just feeling kind of useless tonight. I was supposed to start a job tonight, but it got cancelled due to a problem with the heating and cooling system there this evening. I was looking forward to it, though very nervous. I feel like it happened because I was beginning there, though I know that's not really true. It just seems like every time I get some opportunity, something happens to mess it up. One evening at my house in the family room, a friend of mine I really liked was visiting. My parents were upstairs away from the family room. My friend wanted a back rub and the shirt lifted up. I was thinking, Wow!! ! I had just put my hand up under the shirt when I heard my dad coming toward the family room about something he saw on the news. I thought Crap!! ! That was my opportunity. That opportunity never happened again because my Dad turned the TV on in the family room and stayed with us and that was that.

Being invisible is unpleasant, but you get used to it. Here are some recent examples:

I release a new game onto the Internet every couple of weeks. The usual response is zero.

I finished 30 years of research into economics into solving the world's problems, and posted it on Reddit. Two responses, both making comments that showed they had not even read it.

Last year I was put on the waiting list for an official Aspergers diagnosis (or not). This month I found that they had no record of the letter (even though I have a copy). Anything involving me just stops existing.

Two months ago I applied for state benefits and was told I would get a certain amount each week. I have the letter. They have the bank details. Nothing happened. I just checked the bank. Two months of zero.

A few months ago I applied fror a credit card and was accepted. They said the card would be with me in a week. Nothing happened.

About the same time I applied to have my bank account upgraded. They said yes, that would happen. Nothing happened.

Last month my work said they would like me back, if I got in touch. So I got in touch. Nothing happened.

I could give many other examples. I am invisible. Anything I say or do disappears. I could shout and scream in the street and nobody would hear anything.

It's odd, but you do get used to it. You are not the only one.

hi, bare foot boy. i like your poem quote. my husband is quite a quoter of the classics.

I decided to use Whittier's poem for my quote. Glad you liked it cathylynn.

I guess I'll just drift into nothingness trappedinhell. That's where it sounds like you and me are heading. I guess people can even see us as invisible on the internet just in our typed words. I find that odd. My cousin is a member here and got me into this site to help me. It's funny because I've gone over his posts and he almost always gets responses where people have quoted him and praised him. I guess I'm just needing some of that too. But I'm not feeling confident in it. I think this site might have its popular members and unpopular ones. You have been here longer than me. I'm new so it's probably too early to tell how it'll be with me.

I often feel this way, like I'm in a corner. Your post reminded me of this song and because it is a popular song, I think a lot of people feel invisible, and nobody talks about it.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tBFVzQ_sXxU[/youtube]

Wow! I forgot about that song sufi. That's my song indeed. Thanks for posting it. Strangely, it and your post makes me feel a bit better because I'm not alone in how I feel. That song must speak for alot of people.

Sweet Pea hugs