Teamwork as an amplifier of meaning vs. being a loner

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I've been feeling empty again for a while, like there's no point in doing anything. Occasionally, I get excited about things, then I obsess over it for a while and then it completely drops back to irrelevance (and I'm always confused about why it happened, and it is a source of frustration).

I did notice a recurring theme though: most things that are of interest to me at all will be a lot more interesting if I can engage in it together with other people. When I search my memory of life until now for the feeling of motivation, I always come up with "team" experiences. As a child, I loved teaming up with people to reach a common goal (build something, win a game, get to a location that's hard to reach). More recent memories include working on software and other projects with other people, or playing computer games that rely heavily on cooperation between several players. In comparison to the rest of my life, adding my capabilities to someone else's feels very satisfactory.

Somehow, having other people involved imbues a task with meaning. Without the validation of other people, most of these tasks seem like a lot of work with no real reward.
So far, I've been jumping from interest to interest, hoping to finally find the one thing that really engages me and gives me a sense of fulfillment and purpose. But I'm afraid that what I'm really looking for is cooperation.

I'm afraid of that, of course, because teamwork is also a topic with a lot of negative associations for me. It involves engaging with people, and I have a lot of issues which make that very difficult and usually unpleasant for me. For example, I usually DON'T enjoy talking about this common goal (but I do usually enjoy writing about it). So going to a club or group, as is often recommended to find similar minded people, doesn't seem to be a solution for me, because these congregations are based on the idea of communicating directly a lot. Some may be more action focused, but you'll still end up being an outsider (which again ruins the feeling of being part of the team) if you just go there for that and ignore all social aspects.
The other option is to write in forums or other online communities such as this one. However this has the problem that it is very loosely coupled. There are just too many people involved, many of them I might be in disagreement with, and it feels very impersonal (obviously). So this doesn't help much either.

.... and at this point, I feel like this post is pointless.
I'm trying to find a simple solution where there is none. Both factors contribute to my unhappiness: wavering interests that can go from "very excited" to "how irrelevant and pointless" in a short timespan, as well as a lack of connection with a community.

Yet another wall of text destined for oblivion.

This is something that I've struggled with as well... maintaining even interest in anything or doing things in moderation is just impossible and like you I wind up feeling like, what's the point?

Now here is something that really twists my noodle: I have these classes where we build a team, then after 8 weeks start over again! Some of this work I do with these people brings us very close because we have to rely on people. (cooking school) Our dinners we put out or buffets, etc. are a collective effort that gets public opinion, so the pride is very deep and includes the whole team.

So where does this leave us? I feel empty because when my class changes, I lose that special bond of teamwork and have to re-establish it with another class of different personalities.

Anyway what it boils down to is that "lack of connection" we Aspies supposedly have.... there's a reason why I said supposedly because I think we're actually connected on a fundamental level to every other human being, autistic and "normal". If we can tap into that source of connectedness no matter who it is and what team you're on, you're helping your fellow human beings and that's where it all comes from anyway-- desire to be of help. If you don't want to be of help, then you can't contribute to a team anything more than your expertise and that's very hollow. In other words, it's your intentions that connect everything, your interests wax and wane as does the ebb and flow of life. You're a boat on that ocean, bringing with you only pure intent of aiding people.

Take that attitude out of the picture and it's too mechanical. When I started to have a more positive outlook and reach out to help people (don't even care if it doesn't help, it's the thought that counts) I found my sense of emptiness and disconnection to be greatly diminished.

It's also exhausting to constantly present that attitude directly from will power alone; you must reach deeper for that strength but it is there in all of us just waiting to be tapped.

I think any kind of group participation enhances a person's sense of identity.

For example what would a public speaker on a stage be without his audience? What they do is a solitary effort but it needs an audience witnessing it to give it any kind of meaning.

However, Kirayng makes a really good point about innate Connection anyone can tap into by simple contemplation.