In a rough spot, requesting aid and/or motivation

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Here's the situation:

A couple weeks ago, I was denied a cadet officer position at my school. I've beaten myself up uncontrollably over this, believeing that in failing to get a position, I have failed as a cadet. I feel that the regiment refuses to recognize my expertise, and has left me without rank as a result. Lately I have been feeling a range of emotions in response, from depression, to rage, to suicidal ideations. My performance with academics has suffered as well.

What I wish to ask from you, the good people here at WrongPlanet, is for aid, comfort, and motivation. Thank you.

One of the hardest things to learn is how to pick yourself up after you fall short of a goal you had for yourself.

I'd say, try your hardest to think of a way to achieve it still, for instance can you get a cadet position next term/year? Or, list the reasons you are good at cadets, and look back at it. Just because it's not appreciated by someone else, doesnt mean you can't appreciate yourself and your own skills.

Makes me think of the scene in Peaceful Warrior when Socrates asks," what will you do if you don't qualify for the Olympics?" and Dan stomps off, furious that he could even be asked that. Your dream is a seed. Effort is the soil. Water frequently with failure to produce a bountiful crop of success. There are very few dreams that will grow to fruition without being preceded by failure.

Sweet Pea hugs