So frustrated. Done with it.

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I am still struggling with being numbed out, but at some point I'll find a way to succeed.

I also Overdosed last week, and NO ONE Knows about it other than my friends who hardly talked or mentioned it to me dealing with their own s**t. Some great friends! I'm not going to be there for anyone anymore, I'm not even going to try. Im done with this bs. I'm f*****g sick of the mess people have put me in and turned around then throw in my f*****g face making me look like I'm playing the effing victim well guess what I'm NOT. I'm telling the truth because frankly I HAVE NO WAY OUT.

I'm sorry to hear you've been going through this . From what you've said here I can only suggest that you first stop all contact with those so called friends. They're arent. You know this by now. The drug and alcohol are also a big issue and they are hard to break off from but please do try. The drugs at least since they do the worst damage and quite possibly interfere with any medication you may be taking for your conditions.

Get legal advice concerning the rape at the hospital. If it can be proven and taken to court you will not only get closure from that but also monetary compensation which could become the foundation for you to start a new life.

Post more if you want. It helps to get it out of your system. We're listening.

Thanks dantac, well I talked to my friends and I'm hoping this will give some resolution to things. I'm still struggling and I need to be better about asserting limits. I am also getting off the medication, or have been trying to...but it really doesn't make a difference, actually I just took it today. It really numbs me out, but oh well...at this point I can't tell which life is more numb, being crazy or being careless.