Why is it that some NTs invite more stress into their lives?

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Joe90
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12 Nov 2012, 4:34 pm

It seems nearly everyone I speak to these days have invited more stress into their lives. Is it because some NTs don't know they're born and they take their NT-ness for granted so much that they think their lives are boring unless they have some sort of stress to deal with?

I know a young girl who has a small child, is single, the child doesn't know who her own father is, and this young mother is complaining because she doesn't have any money and can't find a job that fits around her child's school hours - then suddenly she's got herself pregnant by another man who she barely knows and so (I suppose) is going to be a single mother again with another kid to bring up. Why get herself pregnant by some stranger when she doesn't need to?!

I know a woman in her late 50s who is with a man who she's been with for nearly 8 years, and she's now in contact with some bloke who she used to know years ago, who now lives almost up the other end of the country, and she's kind of talking to him on the phone behind her current boyfriend's back, even though she knows that this bloke she's talking to has abused women before. Why is she getting herself into this s**t when she's got a perfectly secure home with a loving man with a secure job?!

I know a man in his 40s with two teenage kids who is homeless (him and his kids are living on the living-room floor at a friend's), but he has gone all the way to somewhere in Asia to meet some woman he met off the internet, leaving his kids practically homeless, the youngest having to find his own way to school and the eldest having a lot of exams at college, also a house could come up any minute and the kids aren't really responsible enough to sort all that out....

Why do people get themselves into these situations for? If anybody had any idea how stressful my life is just living day to day and doing mundane things, they then would think twice.

And then we're the ones who are supposed to be naive and socially immature? It's quite ironic really - I had an older man asking me out, and I don't even fancy him, and I politely told him that over text, because I'm old enough to know who I want and who I don't, and I know what's best for me. Why don't these NTs know what the hell they are getting themselves into? What is wrong with people today? And I can't get involved and dictate to what these people should do, but then I just panic for them for getting themselves into these unnecessary situations then coming crawling back to people like me again when their silly little relationships go wrong. I despair, I really do. :roll: :roll: :roll: :roll: :roll: :roll: :roll:


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ColdEyesWarmHeart
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12 Nov 2012, 6:05 pm

Oh dear. I've known people like this before and the only way I could deal with it is by taking myself out of the situation. People like this not only seem to thrive on drama but they drag everyone around them into their mess. (Usually a mess that they themselves created and have no real interest in sorting out.)

Ok, people can act without thinking and end up in bad situations, but they normally want to get back out of it and will try their best to. Drama-lovers will repeatedly end up in the poo, take no responsibility for it, and whine a lot but do nothing constructive to get themselves out. In fact they'll create more of a mess instead, like in your examples!

And it is tricky sometimes to work out if their friendship is worth keeping - you like them on some level, feel sorry for them, want to help etc. but on the other hand, people like that never change. They will drain your energy completely with their whining, (while refusing any advice or offers of help) you end up emotionally involved with all their self-created problems, you'll worry yourself so much as they keep on placing themselves into ever-more risky situations. It's a one-sided friendship and a thankless task, and are they worth the hassle?



PerfectlyDarkTails
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12 Nov 2012, 7:57 pm

Yeah I don't get it either. I have known people that actually function better when stressed... :?


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League_Girl
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13 Nov 2012, 12:38 am

Some people think they are stupid because they are. I don't get it either.


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