Baby you're a big blue whale. (PTSD post)

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Since I couldn't come up with a title I'm naming this post after a line from one of my favorite sublime songs.

I hate being told I have plenty of time, I hate being told it's all in my head, cause if it's all in my head that's just horrible, it means I'm a creepy introverted freak who can't help it when he treats himself like crap. I can't put my life in words anyone else can understand, I can't describe my situation to anyone, I'm pretty much the most awkwardly woven basket case ever, every psychologist I've been to says they can't figure me out, if I'm so different am I really considered special, or am I a good excuse for rejection? Recently one of my female friends posted a long facebook message about how she was sexually assaulted her first year of college and how she kept it hidden away from everyone, until the pain became to much and she had to seek help. I went through a similar traumatic experience when I was very young one that haunts me to this day, a dark demon that consumes and tortures my mind with laughter and evil thoughts, I try to control them but it is hard to repress feelings that are as violent as mine. I am still nice to people and I've tried to keep that satanic beast locked away , until now I've told my family, close friends, and counselor's of this experience (I won't tell anyone reading this what it is for privacy reasons obviously, but if you're reading this and understand then you probably went through the same events.) I needed to get this out and see if anyone here in the public forum knows anything about PTSD and AS being related.

"Grab a hold of me...
Tell me that I'll never be set free...
But I'm a parasite...
So tell me are you a badfish too?"

Dear FrankiDelano,

I also suffer with PTSD, in my case associated with years of constant psychological abuse from my father.

I don't know if AS and PTSD are neurologically related, but I will say that aspies generally have the type of personality that draws negative attention, especially from abusers.

I have been in the dark place where you are. I won't lie and tell you that there is an easy way out. Things started to change for me when I met a therapist specializing in trauma. She did a lot of PTSD specific treatments with me. From your Spike Spiegel avatar, I assume you're an anime fan. If you ever saw "Ghost Hound", the treatment the main character is getting in the opening episode is EMDR, which is considered quack psychology by some people, but it worked for me.

Be aware that your depression is making everything feel much worse than it actually is. This is not happy talk to make you cheer up. This is a rational goal to set for yourself, of seeing things less clouded by your own gloom. Depression makes it harder to do anything, especially the things we need to do to combat our depression.
Right now what you have to motivate yourself is anger. Take that anger and use it. Go to the gym and spend an hour with the heavy bag, imagining it is the person who hurt you so badly. Go out and walk through the dense spring fog at 2 a.m. plotting revenge. Pick up a crowbar and do katana katas with it until your arms ache. Physical activity will help with some of the physiological effects of depression.

I wish you great good luck, and will point out that I am living proof that with effort, one can get to a better place.

Stay strong and I hope you will consider me
Your friend,

Ikari Gendo

I suffer from PTSD too.
It's really bad for me because I'm going to uni in September but I'll need to pass my exams with flying colours.
PTSD is affecting my health and I'm struggling with my studies.
When the PTSD kicks in I get so stressed I stop eating.
Eating would be the last thing on my mind, and I drink water and tea excessively.
I run away when I smell food, let alone putting it in my mouth.
In the end it all goes in a downward spiral because I'm not feeding my brain, and then I feel worse and even more stressed.
You're not alone, and things will get better.
I hate being told it's all in my head and I'm the one creating problems for myself too
Time will heal everything though, hopefully.
Stay strong buddy.