Worries I will be an Imposter

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lotuspuppy
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29 Mar 2013, 8:06 am

This is an identical thread to one in the "School and College Life" forum, and for that I apologize. I believe it is more of an emotional issue than a school issue per say.

I have applied to graduate school for a profession I want to be in, and have gotten into every single school I applied to. My number one choice at the moment is a technical school in the United States. I like their faculty and academics, and feel they would provide me with excellent networking opportunities. I will visit each school next week to reassess.

Prior to a year ago, I have never heard of this technical school until a year ago. While this is a technical program, I come from a non-technical background (majored in a poli sci/econ hybrid major). I knew it was well regarded in what I wanted to do. Little did I know that for a few closely allied professions, it is considered to be one of the best schools in the world. It's not quite CalTech or MIT, but my understanding is that it's just a notch or two below them. While I know they have an excellent faculty in my chosen department, they probably attract the brightest students in their field.

I am not sure how I feel being among such talent. It's a little intimidating. I would feel like an impostor, and if I matriculate, I may very well struggle against my peers. My peers will have very diverse academic and professional backgrounds, so I can definitely carve a clear niche. Even so, I worry I may struggle, and it may damage my education and future professional life.

Assuming I like the program based on other merits, should I enroll, even if I feel I'll be isolated and at the bottom of the heap? I won't feel totally isolated because I have family who live nearby, and the area has many activities I enjoy. But still, I am wondering if making myself miserable on this accord will defeat my efforts to learn.



ThetaIn3D
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29 Mar 2013, 4:50 pm

I'm an Aspie guy too, who really relates to the impostor feeling. It's easy for me to feel that way in all sorts of situations, even just in life in general. It's not true though; I am not a replica of anyone else or a chameleon, and you did things to deserve to get where you are.

All you can do is accept that they have accepted you, and make the choice not to compare yourself to others. Just keep your eyes on your studies, don't look up, and resolve to just follow through on what you set out to do. It will be much easier that way, and when you're done and you look up again, you will know you deserved it all along. And if you fall down, just pick yourself up again and keep going. You will be satisfied.



lotuspuppy
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31 Mar 2013, 9:19 am

Well thanks. That makes me feel better



lotuspuppy
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06 Apr 2013, 10:29 am

So I am enrolling in this school. I like the culture, and the faculty seems friendly for the most part, but I am probably the least accomplished person there, and certainly younger than the median age. The professors have told me they like this school for the bright students it attracts. Let us hope that I do not disappoint them.



lotuspuppy
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06 Apr 2013, 10:47 am

Also, I feel guilty about going back to school. I feel I am supposed to be working.



ThetaIn3D
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06 Apr 2013, 3:53 pm

I lost track of this thread for a while, I must not have been around when it got bumped up, sorry to miss you!

Glad to give you a boost and hope you're still feeling better. :) Even when I know rationally that I have nothing to feel guilty about, I still struggle with that anyways sometimes. And now I realize the feelings don't change overnight either; but knowing that, and cutting myself some slack is enough to help me get along.

As long as you know they are just feelings, and that, objectively, you are probably normal and just like the other students in their performance and struggles. Professors always criticize their students for this, that and the other, but neither the professors nor the students are perfect and you don't have to be either. Just do your best to make yourself happy and give yourself something extra to feel good about. One day at a time, not judging yourself.

You may be going to school now, but it will increase your value to society even more and open up new possibilities once you graduate. :D



lotuspuppy
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07 Apr 2013, 11:45 pm

ThetaIn3D wrote:
I lost track of this thread for a while, I must not have been around when it got bumped up, sorry to miss you!

Glad to give you a boost and hope you're still feeling better. :) Even when I know rationally that I have nothing to feel guilty about, I still struggle with that anyways sometimes. And now I realize the feelings don't change overnight either; but knowing that, and cutting myself some slack is enough to help me get along.

As long as you know they are just feelings, and that, objectively, you are probably normal and just like the other students in their performance and struggles. Professors always criticize their students for this, that and the other, but neither the professors nor the students are perfect and you don't have to be either. Just do your best to make yourself happy and give yourself something extra to feel good about. One day at a time, not judging yourself.

You may be going to school now, but it will increase your value to society even more and open up new possibilities once you graduate. :D

You are probably right. We are all insecure. We will also be definitely more valuable to society once we get out.