I want to leave, permanently! [Not a suicide note]

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(Not a suicide note; I bet I fooled you)
[It's not nice to fool MrMark. ]
Hey!
Has anyone ever noticed how awesome you can be when you take on the role of foreigner? When I lived in France, and the other time when I went to Russia, I almost felt like a celebrity.

At home I have this friend who everyone likes but I'm not allowed to be him unless I'm abroad. Actually, I copy his style and get away with it. The great thing with being foreign is that noone expects anything from you. If they notice something weird, they just think it's something cultural they can't really grasp. You can even be sleazy and be met with positive response. On the whole though, you get alot of confidence and before you know it, you are very outgoing.

To think I even chatted up this model girl in France once(No joke!) and at home I'm the weirdo in the back of the class whom only the videogame nerds would befriend. Talk about contrast

I wish I wasn't so darn attached to my home and family. I wish I was educated enough to make it work. I wish time could slow down so I could prepare(I'm sure I won't be hot stuff abroad if I grow to old). I wish I had money.

Someone may say that it ain't real, that it's a fake lifestyle, but you know what, I don't give a s**t! I WANT that and nothing but! The worst part is that I experienced it and learned it's not out of my reach. If I had never left, I'd probably feel content in mediocrity.

I thought you were leaving the forum.