Emotional Support

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I have Schizoid personality traits in which I don’t show much emotion or the need for the emotional support of others. While this is true in most cases I have on times when something serious has happen do have an emotional feeling but I can’t seem to get any emotional support from anyone, even when I ask for it. Last year my mother died after a long battle with cancer I had no real feelings of grief, I was happy she wasn’t suffering anymore. Friends and family told me they were sorry for my lost but no one seemed to care to take the time to see if I was really hurting inside. I wonder if someone had taken the time if I might have found some repressed grief or sadness about it. Once when I was talking to a family member and I brought up the death of my mother they told me I couldn’t use that because I didn’t care she was gone; and that’s not even why I brought it up in the first place but was going to use it as an example about what we were talking about. Just recently a coworker that I look up to as a Father figure has rejected me and is ignoring me just because of a policy that was put into place at work. I told some coworkers that he hurt me in way he doesn’t even realize and no one seem to care to enquire what that might be. I am sure I am to blame for this as I mostly come across as aloof and disinterested.

I know what you are talking about. I don't seem to relate to people on an emotional level. I don't know if I do not give them enough information or I don't convey it in a compelling manner. My psych testing showed schizoid traits. Blame seems like a critical thing to say about the failure to get emotional support. Sort of like it is not bad enough to not get the little help you would like but then you haved to be blamed for it. Very isolating.

I relate with not giving enough information or conveying things in a compelling matter. (Could it be because of the flat-line personality perhaps? ) It makes me feel better knowing others suffer this as well because you’re right it is very isolating and that’s never good, even for a Schizoid.

I'm schizoid too, and sometimes I give people cryptic hints about how I'm feeling, but no one really knows how to respond, so it gets ignored.

I'm sorry about your mom though, and that your coworker is ignoring you. It's hard for us to feel close to anyone at all, so when we finally do trust someone and they reject us, it really hurts!

At the risk of sounding sexist I would think being a female with this problem would be a lot harder since females are viewed as more emotional than males. A male can fall under the stereotype of needing to be the strong silent type; I would think females who showed little emotion would be viewed more critically by the world.

Haha, well the irony is that it's kind of a non-issue to me, since I don't really want to interact with people anyway. Schizoids tend to be asexual, and I don't really feel female. I've been aware from an early age that the world doesn't see me as fitting the typical female mold, and that's okay with me!

What I wanted most of all was a nuclear family. I failed at romantic relationships but was lucky to have a child. I think it is seen as very unexpected and probably unwanted for a woman to be unemotional and not express herself very well.

Someone on Wrong Planet once said that they thought women that easily had romantic relationships cried a lot. It appears that way to me. I don't think men feel a logical woman is very attractive or meets their needs.

Thanks for sharing and giving your insight it really helped, it’s comforting to know others have experience this as well. Best of luck to both you all and thanks again.