Unsupportive Parents

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My mother is a horrible, horrible person. She claims to love me, but her actions prove otherwise. I want to become a substitute teacher, and I would basically be following in her, my father, and my older brother's footsteps, but she's using my condition as an excuse to hold me back, despite the fact that I'm a 27-year-old adult and am perfectly capable of making my own decisions. She said "I don't want to get hurt," but she's hurting me with the fact that she's being unsupportive, and even brought the R-word into the equation. I'm sorry, I just can't forgive her, and if she does apologize, she'd probably couple it with an excuse, and Benjamin Franklin said, "Never ruin an apology with an excuse." I've gotten much better support from people online than my own family. What does that tell you?

I would not listen to her if she is only bringing you down. It is your life, not hers, and you are an adult so you have a right to make your own decisions. It doesn't matter if it is your blood family or not, please don't let anybody hold you back.

I feel the same way that you do, my mother is very unsupportive of me, and well, she uses my disabilities as an excuse of why I can't do many things for example:

1.) Get a job
2.) Move out
3.) Go on a date
4.) Hang out with friends
5.) Get my license

Or pretty much anything actually...As you can imagine, I'm 19 and want my freedom, which I admit, I don't know much about the outside world, I suppose people CAN take advantage of me because I tend to think everyone else feels and thinks the same as I do, and also I don't even know how to work a washing and drying machine...or learn really anything that's not my current obsession.

I can see where my disabilities would become an obsticle, but that doesn't mean she shouldn't let me TRY and FAIL on my OWN.

That's what your mother needs to do for you, just let you try, if you suceed, good if not that's too bad.

And yeah don't listen to her, and the R word? Are you freakin serious? Autism is NOT mental retardation (I'm assuming thats what the R word is)

Totally two seperate developmental conditions, that sometimes occur alongside eachother etc but yeah

You are a grown man, you have the right to decide what you want to do with your life. She does not.

I don't think your mother not supporting you in your career choice makes her a "horrible, horrible person"

You are 27. She is not holding you back. You are just as free to leave and do what you want as she is free to do what she wants. Be for warned though, if one does what they want in life when their parents don't approve, one should not expect their parents to help them out financially if it does not work out.

I think a big part of it may be that she's being overly-protective and trying to shield you from the world because of your diagnosis, which is a sign she cares about you. That said, I don't blame you for being upset at how she is handling it, especially her use of the "R" word.

If you haven't already, I think you should sit down with her and calmly explain how the way she is treating you makes you feel. I'd suggest this because a) your feelings are valid and b) she might see it as a sign of maturity, which could be a first step in having her treat you more like an adult.

Okay- I think I'm going to write a long post- but I'll do a short version at the end just if you don't feel like reading it.

First off- really? Who's crazy to use autism as an excuse to keep you from going out there and doing your dreams? It's possible there scared, angry, but it might not have anything to do with you. They could have been held back when they were kids, maybe they don't think you have it as a sub, but still, they should help you achieve your dreams. What's gonna happen after they die?

One question- Is subbing really your things. It doesn't quite sound like it, but if it is, don't let me stop you! I do want to give you insight however. Subbing requires education and training, and since you're parents aren't going to support you, you will be unable to do it right away. You'll have to get another job and save up for college- unless you decide on filling out the FASA, you're 27 after all and they don't ask for parents permission. And whatever you do, don't let her have power of attorney over her.

Necro. 3 years old.

And the OP has not been on here in almost a year.