I am starting to cry about being rejected.

Post Reply New Topic

I had most recently posted in here about being rejected by a close friend after she seemed to shut things off on me suddenly after inviting me to her house for Christmas last year and acting like everyone was fine. Then she started turning her nose in the air at me as if she is more important.
I went and looked at an archived message that she sent me two months ago and everything in there is about how we cannot be friends for two reasons.

1. She is in a different leaf of her life that I am- She wants to get involved in ministry while learn, and I want to learn and turn it into a career.
2. She felt that we both were just going to spring up the negative in each other.

I feel that everything that she said is poison and sharp barbs right now. So I just deleted everything so I would not have to think about it so I can heal. It's like I go to bed at night and then when I wake up the pain is back. I also feel so angry towards her that it's not even funny. I am at the point where I want to retaliate against her for what she did.

I feel like she did not have this problem before and then she does and pulls this.

Maybe consider it the death of a friendship and grieve for it. If you don't retaliate against her, at some point you might be friends again after she pursues what she is going after at this time.

She also mentioned in her posting that she is getting involved with more things now that she likes vs. what I like. Then she said something about wanting to learn but not turn it into a career and go into ministry, while I want to study math and physics in a derogatory light. I don't know what this part means.

Forgive and forget, not for their sake, but for your sanity. Move on.

Actually I have heard the opposite of forgiving. I have heard that you forgive the person for their actions while letting go by emotionally detached yourself. Forgiveness also means that you are in no control of their actions. Instead of forgetting you don't forget what happened while also reconciling. At the same time you don't be buddy buddy with that person. In other words, you tell them that their actions were not okay.

do not retaliate just act ok
sometimes some friends cut off for a while and then
they come back
it happened with me
she might come back again

sometimes they do not come back-or say one thing and do another thing and they might even try to get others to throw you away like they did-thats rough to have happen-they hold such a vindictive grudge they try to have others hate you too.

She most recently got married nearly 4 years ago and although I know marriage and relationships change you, a major part of me feels that she has been acting better than I am since. Then again she has always been a little on the snotty side at times next to enjoying to make me jealous because she feels icky about herself.

I was also talking to a casual friend of mine yesterday who she has known for years and he told me that marriage can sometimes do that to friendships and then if my friend gets a divorce with him, she would be up a creek.