Not autistic enough for autism support

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I know this is a bit of a cliche but everything feels so futile right now. I broke up with an ex a few months back and had to move back with my parents on the other side of the country - her mum basically lied and said I wouldn't be kicked out right after if we split up, and that adds to my distrust of people, but I'll shelf that for now.

My current situation is that I have to sleep on my parents' sofa, my parents and siblings have serious mental issues and can't help me, I'm terrified of using phones so it's difficult to make contact, I don't have any friends, and I've been suffering for a long time with anxiety and depression which have worsened lately.

Today I built up the confidence to actually get in touch with social services, because I need to be assessed by them for support so that a local autism charity can be funded to give me help with finding housing and employment. It's difficult for me because I both need my own space and cope very badly with living fully alone because of my anxiety. Staying where I am isn't much of an option.

Anyway, the first call seemed productive but then I got a call back in which I was basically told I wasn't autistic or otherwise disadvantaged enough (as judged from a five minute phone call) to get support and strongly discouraged me from being assessed.

Now I don't know what to do, getting in contact with them was stressful enough and now that I've finished crying I guess I feel like the only option or way to have my needs taken seriously at all is to do something that I really shouldn't and I feel pathetic for not being able yo take that step. It's gotten to the point where I think it is the only rational option to make progress though and that brings me back to the futility of things. Even this thread seems futile; what am I really expecting?

Why don't you go to the Council in person....or go see a psychologist in person.

Or call the National Autistic Society helpline (0808 800 4104) and ask them for advice.

Can you approach your doctor rather than social services? Sounds like your anxiety is interfering with your life. Perhaps your doctor can offer a diagnosis. With a diagnosis I imagine it would be easier to deal with social services.

I don't have a doctor because I moved relatively recently and I don't have any proof of address. I don't know what you mean by a diagnosis - obviously I have diagnosed Aspergers and I've been diagnosed with depression relatively recently but idk if anxiety is something you can be diagnosed with. Even if I could I can't really contact the GP on my own because of the anxiety.

And I wish I lived in a world where you can "just see" a psychologist or the council or anything, but that's not how it works to my knowledge and even if it was you'd need an appointment and I'm almost as terrified of new places as I am of the phone calls that I'd need to do to get one.

TBH I was sort of expecting people here to be somewhat understanding of it - you all seem relatively capable and don't really understand where I'm coming from, so you underplay and belittle my issues which is what I experience from pretty much every NT too. Not aiming that at all of you but I think reading the replies has made me worse rather than better, so I'll stop now.

Oh for sure you can be diagnosed with anxiety! That and depression are what qualify me for disability.


I'm sorry if I caused you to feel this way. I can identify with your struggles with anxiety for sure. If you are living with your parents, get ID at that address and get a doctor. Are you taking medication? This may be something to consider.

If you are having suicidal thoughts, you need to deal with that before moving.