Tired of constantly trying to pull myself up only to fall

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I was just recently diagnosed earlier this year but I've always had problems. I came from an abusive household with my parents who joked for years about the abuse and bring things up like shoving a hot dog up a six year old nose.

I am in constant terror as I am always used in a relationship. No matter where I go I can't take care of myself. I'm from Chicago I have three kids. One from a woman who lied to me so she can have a kid turns out she was a gay butch who turned grew her hair out so can get a man to get her pregnant. I was the the foolish one who couldn't see who she really was though everyone else claimed to know.

Currently I had another kid and got married to a woman four years ago who rushed to get married because she needed to stay in the country. I was with her two years prior and once we were married and she got knocked up she completely changed.

I am close to being homeless I do not have any skills every time I try to get public assistance I get denied with people looking at me saying I don't look like I need help cause I dress nice and sound professional. Even after my diagnosis I had the same issue.

Only thing I was able to get done was job vocational rehab but I can't pull myself up to complete the tasks for that.

I don't know what I am going to do and where I am going to go.

I am literally floating out there with no real friends and no one who cares about me...

Do the kids live with you?

If you are denied assistance cos of looks and articulateness, then dress and dumb down.

I get help much easier now I have learnt to cry on demand with these people. Stammering's good too.

Take care