How to Escape From Abusive Parents?

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I have been trying very hard to find a way to escape from them, and I cannot find any viable options.
My parents are not physically abusive, but they are extremely abusive in other ways.
I do not want to go into detail because I do not want them to find out this is me.

I cannot get/hold a job. I don't know anyone other than my parents.
I don't know where to go. I get SSI, but it's not enough to get the cheapest apartment.
I was thinking of moving into a group home, but I'm scared that it won't work out for me.

My life would be good if I could just get away from my parents.
They have been abusing me for my entire life, and I have wanted to get away from them the entire time.
I don't know how to get away from them.

Is there any way for me to escape from them?

Speak to them about the possibility of you wanting to try and live on your own, that you just want to give it a go, but if it didn't work out then you'd like to be able to return home. This would take some of the pressure off you and they may be willing to help you out financially.
If it didn't work out, then having that time apart from them might improve the relationship between you.

I have been talking to them about it for years. They will not help me. They have no money, only I have money.

So they'd struggle if you were to leave them?

No. There are other ways they can support themselves.

But at the moment, they're relying on your help?

Yes, but they don't need to, they could find other ways to cope.
They are destroying the remainder of sanity I have left and they do not care.
I need to get away from them.

Then just empty your accounts, pack your gear, and go.

Can you find a "work in exchange for board" job? Or create one? A janitor always gets an apartment but take a small building. Maybe there are people who have needs you can fulfil if they let you live in the basement with kitchen privileges. Doing the lawn (weeding!) and shovelling snow (salt & grit) come to mind.

When we were living with Mom who had Alzheimer's, we all went to work and left her alone. We worried all day. If there could have been somebody there, just in case, qualifications: ability to call 911 - I think we'd have hired him and let him live in the basement. If you find a gig like this, make sure you are not in any way involved in medications etc and get that in writing.

The very best of luck to you!

So it's convenient for them that you stick around. Presumably they're either trying to convince you that you wouldn't be able to cope on your own, undermining your self-confidence, or that they wouldn't be able to cope on their own, making you feel guilty. Probably a bit of both.

They might be right, but there's only one way to find out. Maybe they would accept it a little easier if you pitched it as a temporary thing, that you just need time away from them to get your head together. If you do end up returning, they might appreciate you more and treat you with more respect.

There is nothing they can do, and I don't know where I can go.
They are extremely abusive, and they are not going to change.
I never want to see them again, and I never want to be in this house ever again.
I would do just fine on my own if I could just afford to pay rent.



I don't think I can do that. I have severe social anxiety and paranoia, so I don't think that is possible.
If there were a job that did not include working with other people, I might be capable of doing that.
But, I can't find any solitary work.



I don't know where to go, and I don't have much money to spend as it is on anything other than rent, utilities, and food.

Would it be possible for you to find somewhere to live and get by on the essentials for 3-6 months without having a job? Just to see how you get on and to experience how life is without your parents in your face all of the time. You might begin to feel differently about taking a job and getting to know a few people after a few months, or you might begin to feel differently about your parents and home. If it doesn't work out, at least you gave it a go and there might be something positive that comes out of it, even if it's just a small thing.

No. I don't have enough money to do that.
I'm being abused.
I want to leave and never come back.

The only way for me to cope here is to hide in my room.
But, every time I need to eat, it's a f*****g nightmare.
It is extremely bad for me, and no one understands or cares!

How can I find a way to move into my own place and be able to afford it?
I can't work because of my problem with people. Anxiety/Autism/Meltdowns.
I don't know how to explain, I have a lot of trouble communicating, and no one gets what I am saying!

Believe me, I understand you. At least, you sound exactly like me, so I hope I have some understanding of the problem.

I wish I had an answer.

Could you live in a tent or U-haul equivalent in your grandparents' back yard?

As for work, the most commonly recommended is librarian. That needs but a degree, but could you apply to a library to stack books? How about stocking merchandise in a store - you could wear earplugs. Filing clerk - often that's a quiet, lonely job. Messenger, there's a thought.

I think of you often; don't give up!

We'll understand your situation a little better with each post you make. I guess it's the default position here to assume that other people will have the ability to function reasonably independently , so as not to appear patronizing, but I expect that a great many of us can't hold down a job or look after ourselves very well. I live in the UK where it's easier to get financial support than in the United States, though the UK is currently moving more towards the US model.

From what you've written it looks like you don't really have any practical option at present other than to stay with your parents, so if that's the case, it's the relationship with your parents that needs to be addressed, rather than stewing over the non-prospect of moving out.

If there really is work like that available, I would definitely be capable of doing it.
There is a program here that can help me find work, but I have had doubts that they could help me find a tolerable job.
I'm thinking I'm going to give them a try if there is solitary work available.

Thank you.



The relationship with the parents is hopeless. They have been this way for my entire life.
It doesn't matter how hard I try or what I do, they are going to continue to abuse me.
I cannot take any more abuse.