I'm scared of change

Post Reply New Topic

I have always been bad at dealing with change, like when we moved when I was little I got bad depression. But its a bit different now.

This semester has been the best of my life. I have made so many friends and I have realized that it is possible to have good friends, people that truly care about me. As a matter of fact I would go so far as to say I am quite popular (at least compared to my own standards) And I love all of my friends. I am an RA as well. But. Its over in about 4 weeks. And I am only going half a year next year because I graduate in december. I am scared! All of my life I have been waiting for life to be the way it is now but I hate the idea of leaving it all. Scared it won't be the same when I get back in the fall and scared that the sadness of knowing I only have one more semester to be with my new friends will rob me of the joy of my situation as it has many times. I am scared of change itself.

I feel like when something ends it is THE end. I know thats wrong, the road of life goes ever onward and there are a hundred new beginnings to take before I die. BUt I feel like everything is just pushing me closer and closer to dying, that its all just a downwards spiral.

I shouldn't be saying all this probably, I honestly should be talking about how thankful I am in order to stop having negative thoughts. But I guess I'm just getting them now for some complications right now.

Hmm, because you have such good friends, I think it would be a good idea to explain to them that you don't want to lose contact with each other because you really value them. Like, you could meet somewhere very weekend or day or two or something.

I intend to keep in touch. But feelings aren't always rational. I know I really shouldn't be feeling this way. And I tell myself this many times. after all, plenty of people are in my situation and don't feel bad, or if they feel bad its outweighed by good feelings.

I just felt like I had to vent my feelings a bit.

That's okay, we all need to vent at some point, and that's what The Haven is for.

I had a similar feeling when i left high school to go to college. MOst of my school career i had no friends and was pretty shy and quiet, but finally senior year i met some cool people and then after graduation it was hard to keep in contact with them. I still see some of them when i go home, but it's tough because they are 4 hours away. I talk to several of them on the computer and it helps. Over the last couple years i have made new friendships with the new people i live around and it has helped me quite a bit. It was a long and hard process to find new friends, but it eventually happened just like it did for me in high school. I'm sure you will be able to talk to them on the comptuer to help keep up on how they are doing and whatnot. I know it is not the same as being with them in person, but it helped me to be able to talk with them each day.

Me too!

I don't like change either!