Page 1 of 2 [ 31 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2  Next

androbot01
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Sep 2014
Age: 54
Gender: Female
Posts: 6,746
Location: Kingston, Ontario, Canada

27 Nov 2015, 6:08 pm

So my pain is twofold:

1) Back pain. I have aggravated an old injury and am in constant pain now. I saw my family doctor and she prescribed gabapentin for nerve pain and she ordered an x-ray. I am seeing her Monday regarding the results of the x-ray which came back much sooner than had been indicated to me by the technician. I fear there might be something wrong ... actually I know there is something wrong. I am more curious as to what it is. The injury occurred almost 20 years ago and I have neglected it. Now it is becoming a problem.

2) Love. I am totally in love with my much younger co-worker whom I know I cannot have a romantic relationship with. Mostly because I made my feeling apparent and he said "I don't have relationships with co-workers." Fair enough, but it doesn't change my total love for this guy. Truly I am a sad and broken old woman.

So I have learned that pain is constant and either you live with it or you die. And lessening it is always rewarding.

So maybe life is an education in the conscious lessening of pain.

I'm blithering a bit because I feel pushed to the edge. I'm doing okay at my job. I saw my psychiatrist yesterday and he is pleased that I am able to maintain a full time job. I think it should be "life, liberty and functionality" because the pursuit of happiness seems irrelevant.

Anyway, my question is: what is your pain and how do you live with it?



kraftiekortie
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 87,510
Location: Queens, NYC

27 Nov 2015, 6:15 pm

You are NOT an old woman! Heck no!

I bet your SpringChickenness would come out if you met the right guy.

I'm sorry about your back pain--does the medication have bad side effects?

There will be other guys. At least this guy was honest with you. He probably liked you--but didn't want to take the plunge because of the risks of relationships on the job. I've had a few relationships on the job myself; they ended either neutrally, or rather bad.



Fnord
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 6 May 2008
Gender: Male
Posts: 60,939
Location:      

27 Nov 2015, 6:19 pm

Back and joint pain: Aspirin and aspirin-laced adhesive plasters.

Emotional pain: Illogical. Emotions can not feel pain. Just because my father beat me as a child and the kids at school beat me and the teachers made fun of me and my family hasn't spoken to me in months and ... and ... :cry: ... WAAAAAAAAHH!



androbot01
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Sep 2014
Age: 54
Gender: Female
Posts: 6,746
Location: Kingston, Ontario, Canada

27 Nov 2015, 6:32 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
You are NOT an old woman! Heck no!

You're a sweetie, kraftie.

kraftiekortie wrote:
I'm sorry about your back pain--does the medication have bad side effects?

Not as bad as the pain and immobility.

kraftiekortie wrote:
There will be other guys. At least this guy was honest with you. He probably liked you--but didn't want to take the plunge because of the risks of relationships on the job. I've had a few relationships on the job myself; they ended either neutrally, or rather bad.

Yeah, he's a good guy. Smarter than me even though he's younger.

Fnord wrote:
Back and joint pain: Aspirin and aspirin-laced adhesive plasters.

I'm curious to know what the doctor has to say about the x-ray. The gabapentin helps, but it's a low dose.

Fnord wrote:
Emotional pain: Illogical. Emotions can not feel pain. Just because my father beat me as a child and the kids at school beat me and the teachers made fun of me and my family hasn't spoken to me in months and ... and ... :cry: ... WAAAAAAAAHH!

Sweetie, you're going to have to feel this pain and be okay with it. You think it will make you weak, but it will make you stronger.



Fnord
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 6 May 2008
Gender: Male
Posts: 60,939
Location:      

27 Nov 2015, 6:41 pm

androbot01 wrote:
Fnord wrote:
Back and joint pain: Aspirin and aspirin-laced adhesive plasters.
I'm curious to know what the doctor has to say about the x-ray. The gabapentin helps, but it's a low dose.
There is some osteoporosis and cartilage damage. He also wants to do another electro-myelogram.
androbot01 wrote:
Fnord wrote:
Emotional pain: Illogical. Emotions can not feel pain. Just because my father beat me as a child and the kids at school beat me and the teachers made fun of me and my family hasn't spoken to me in months and ... and ... :cry: ... WAAAAAAAAHH!
Sweetie, you're going to have to feel this pain and be okay with it. You think it will make you weak, but it will make you stronger.
I've been dealing with the knowledge that I'm an unwanted child since I was 8. Yes, my parents "had to" get married about seven and a half months before I was born. Everything else precipitates from that.

"Dealing with it" is all I can do.



androbot01
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Sep 2014
Age: 54
Gender: Female
Posts: 6,746
Location: Kingston, Ontario, Canada

27 Nov 2015, 6:51 pm

Fnord wrote:
I've been dealing with the knowledge that I'm an unwanted child since I was 8. Yes, my parents "had to" get married about seven and a half months before I was born. Everything else precipitates from that.

"Dealing with it" is all I can do.


My father didn't want me. He bailed when I was 4.

My mother did though, so I was lucky there.

Not being wanted sucks. Nobody ever beat it into me, but I got the message. I guess it's best to leave it in the past, but I am haunted by memories.



Fnord
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 6 May 2008
Gender: Male
Posts: 60,939
Location:      

27 Nov 2015, 6:56 pm

androbot01 wrote:
Fnord wrote:
I've been dealing with the knowledge that I'm an unwanted child since I was 8. Yes, my parents "had to" get married about seven and a half months before I was born. Everything else precipitates from that. "Dealing with it" is all I can do.
My father didn't want me. He bailed when I was 4. My mother did though, so I was lucky there. Not being wanted sucks. Nobody ever beat it into me, but I got the message. I guess it's best to leave it in the past, but I am haunted by memories.
That's it, "in a nutshell". Being unwanted, having an ASD, and having childhood allergies to just about everything ... I can't shake the memories, so I just deal with it - I ignore the feelings until I get the chance to express them with no one else around.



cberg
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 31 Dec 2011
Gender: Male
Posts: 12,183
Location: A swiftly tilting planet

27 Nov 2015, 8:25 pm

Physical? Sports & strain injuries are the big ones. Stuff like nerve pain from too much time at desks is the main thing but I've had countless sprains, a lot of dislocations (shoulders, cervical vertebrae, fingers, thumbs, wrists, jaw), fractures & bone chips (shin splints/cycling pedal gashes, ribs I think & mainly tailbone)...
And so I shall never touch semi-synthetic painkillers until I REALLY need some wisdom teeth gone. I usually make my living on deductive reasoning alone anyway.

The emotional is why I became an adrenaline junkie. Perhaps I'm lucky to have found that balance early on.

The only answer to that plus insomnia/sleep paralysis nibbling at my ankles is medical marijuana, friends.


_________________
"Standing on a well-chilled cinder, we see the fading of the suns, and try to recall the vanished brilliance of the origin of the worlds."
-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos :mrgreen:


kraftiekortie
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 87,510
Location: Queens, NYC

27 Nov 2015, 8:28 pm

Well....you're wanted now....by many of us on WP.

I was sort of "unwanted," too, in a way. I was "unexpected." My mother wanted to go to school to better herself....then I came along. It deferred her dreams for a while.



androbot01
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Sep 2014
Age: 54
Gender: Female
Posts: 6,746
Location: Kingston, Ontario, Canada

28 Nov 2015, 10:35 am

cberg wrote:
The only answer to that plus insomnia/sleep paralysis nibbling at my ankles is medical marijuana, friends.

I hear ya friend. So true.

kraftiekortie wrote:
I was sort of "unwanted," too, in a way. I was "unexpected." My mother wanted to go to school to better herself....then I came along. It deferred her dreams for a while.

I don't understand why parents blame their children for their own decision to have them in the first place. We should be blaming them for bringing us into this hell.



Raleigh
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 7 Jul 2014
Age: 125
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 34,587
Location: Out of my mind

29 Nov 2015, 3:29 am

My pain is both physical and emotional.
I dull the pain with copious amounts of alcohol.


_________________
It's like I'm sleepwalking


nick007
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 May 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 27,825
Location: was Louisiana but now Vermont in capitalistic military dictatorship called USA

02 Dec 2015, 1:39 am

Right now I have pain in my left hip if I walk or stand too long. My doc thinks it's nerve pain in the T band area & gave me some exercises to do & prescribed Aleve(500mg 2x a day). I think the Aleve may be stopping the pain from radiating down my leg but I still get the pain in my hip. I take Gabapentin for my OCD which is also a low dose(400mg 3x a day) & i don't have any side-effects. My doc mentioned that it could be increased for nerve pain but she wasn't ready to do it then. I should keep taking the Aleve & give the exercises a chance.

I've had lots of periods in emotional pain including crushing & falling in love with someone I cant have cuz she's a celebrity & falling into a psychotic depression after my 1st relationship ended. Thankfully I'm in my 3rd relationship now & things are going pretty good between us.


_________________
"I don't have an anger problem, I have an idiot problem!"
~King Of The Hill


"Hear all, trust nothing"
~Ferengi Rule Of Acquisition #190
https://memory-alpha.fandom.com/wiki/Ru ... cquisition


skibum
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 18 Jul 2013
Age: 58
Gender: Female
Posts: 8,481
Location: my own little world

02 Dec 2015, 3:25 am

You are not old. In some Southwest Native American culture you are still considered a child until the age of 51.


_________________
"I'm bad and that's good. I'll never be good and that's not bad. There's no one I'd rather be than me."

Wreck It Ralph


androbot01
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Sep 2014
Age: 54
Gender: Female
Posts: 6,746
Location: Kingston, Ontario, Canada

02 Dec 2015, 4:42 am

nick007 wrote:
I take Gabapentin for my OCD which is also a low dose(400mg 3x a day) & i don't have any side-effects. My doc mentioned that it could be increased for nerve pain but she wasn't ready to do it then.


My doctor prescribed gabapentin for my pain. I'm on 300mg x3/day. It is helping.



cberg
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 31 Dec 2011
Gender: Male
Posts: 12,183
Location: A swiftly tilting planet

02 Dec 2015, 2:40 pm

skibum wrote:
You are not old. In some Southwest Native American culture you are still considered a child until the age of 51.


8O oh...


_________________
"Standing on a well-chilled cinder, we see the fading of the suns, and try to recall the vanished brilliance of the origin of the worlds."
-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos :mrgreen:


androbot01
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Sep 2014
Age: 54
Gender: Female
Posts: 6,746
Location: Kingston, Ontario, Canada

02 Dec 2015, 2:43 pm

cberg wrote:
skibum wrote:
You are not old. In some Southwest Native American culture you are still considered a child until the age of 51.


8O oh...


I'm 45 and I can only speak for myself. I'm old. Old and broken and ready for the next incarnation.