Trying to handle my sister's terminal illness.

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EgotisticalAltruist
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31 Aug 2016, 9:54 am

About three months ago, we find out my sis has stage 4 cancer in her lungs, brain and bones. She's doing the treatment and I'm trying to be the best little brother I can, but I'm torn up on the inside. I'm managing alright now but I'm afraid I'm going to lose control when she goes.



the_phoenix
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31 Aug 2016, 10:33 am

EgotisticalAltruist,

That's a hard thing to go through. I'm sorry.
Praying for your sister, your family, and you.



kraftiekortie
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31 Aug 2016, 1:53 pm

I know it's hard.

I'm sure your sister is glad that you're around to help her out, especially during the treatments.

I believe it will be tough for you when/if she passes away; but I think you'll prevail, despite the hurt you feel.



BeaArthur
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31 Aug 2016, 8:56 pm

I'm sorry you are going through this, and sorry also for your sister.

But life's sorrows cannot be avoided. It's okay to fall apart, but try not to have it be irreversible. I don't know much about you, but you wouldn't want to lose your housing or your job - if this applies to you - because of overwhelming grief.

I've made an appointment to see a therapist because my husband has a progressive neurological disorder and I just had a mini-stroke last week. I feel overwhelmed, and that threatens my coping, so I know I need to get some help.


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Last edited by BeaArthur on 31 Aug 2016, 11:25 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Raleigh
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31 Aug 2016, 10:37 pm

love her.
That's all you can do
And all she would want.
I have level 4 brain tumour (GBM)
and the love I've felt from others
has been the greatest comfort and joy to me.


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EgotisticalAltruist
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01 Sep 2016, 2:16 am

Raleigh wrote:
love her.
That's all you can do
And all she would want.
I have level 4 brain tumour (GBM)
and the love I've felt from others
has been the greatest comfort and joy to me.


Thank you, this helps alot.



Campin_Cat
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01 Sep 2016, 9:39 am

You MAY totally lose control, but that's OKAY----in-FACT, I RECOMMEND it!!

I think that would've been a better solution than the way *I* chose to deal with my older sister's death, when she died around this time last year, from stage 4 cancer. I wouldn't allow myself to cry / lose it, because I had so many things to attend to----so, I would end-up doing things like sitting at the bus stop talking to someone, and having tears well-up in my eyes (thank goodness for sunglasses); and, that lasted for at least a WEEK (whereas, maybe, if I'd let myself go, I would've gotten a grip, after a day or two----NOT, that I would've been over it; but, I feel one should allow themselves, the process).

I feel it would be HEALTHY if you allow yourself a little "breakdown"; then, you can pick yourself up, and go from there----just don't let it consume you.