I had to do a similar thing a few years back because I just couldn't cope with everything (this was before my diagnosis). It wasn't so much loneliness though as just being emotionally overwhelmed. I had lived at home to complete my bachelor's degree and then decided to move out to another city with my BF. It was a horrible time: I was working at a minimum wage job full-time and trying to go back to school because the degree I got was useless, my BF and I were having major relationship issues, and I started developing severe physical (not to mention psychological/emotional) problems. Ended up having to break the lease on our apartment and move back home with my parents, forgoing college, and I've been there up until a month ago. I didn't really have many friends to begin with and spent the majority of my time in the house. Was pissed off and went through depressive episodes and existential life crises numerous times about the state of my life and how this wasn't where I was supposed to be at this stage. Now, my BF-now-fiance and I just moved out on our own (again) and this move hasn't been any easier. In fact, it seems worse than the last time around. On top of the ASD, I have since been diagnosed with adrenal fatigue and an autoimmune condition (among other things) so life isn't exactly a walk in the park. But I am attempting (community) college again this semester.
So, I do have some sense of what it's like, even though our situations are different in some regards, but what is it specifically that is frustrating to you? The fact that you are in community college instead of a university? Not having friends at home? Living with your parents when you feel you should be independent and out on your own? Overwhelmed with the psychological complications of the disorder? All of the above?
Don't give up or lose hope... things may suck now but eventually you will find something that pulls you out and gives you a reason to fight for whatever it is you want in life.
25 Aug 2016, 8:06 pm
