I just might do it

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Joined: 6 Mar 2007
Age: 39
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08 May 2007, 12:27 pm

I'm in a bad state at the moment. I'm so depressed that I cannot see the light at the end of the tunnel anymore. I might just end my life any day now. The funny thing is the fact that i'm trying to use my mind to find a way to end it. I have a bullet..... but I lack a gun. So i've told myself that I can build myself a gun using my skills. I'm sure I can do it :roll: The ani depresants i'm taking aren't working as well as I had hoped. The thing is a part of me doesn't want them to work. I feel as though i've messed up so much

cecilfienkelstien
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08 May 2007, 12:38 pm

When I'm feeling down and like there is no hope I try and think about my interests or anything else that has any shred of happiness to it. I know its hard. I know some days its so hard to go out and face the world. and that peopoe around you don't seem to know how hard we work on a daily basis. But there has to be hope at the end of the tunnel, there has to be light! Maby your meds need to be adjusted. I know when I was feel deppresed last week I talked to my doctor and he said the next time I go in he will review my medication. cynicism is one of my worst enemies so I hope I wasn't too cynical

postpaleo
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09 May 2007, 3:39 am

I had a really rough go it not very long a go. Finger nails in the desk type feelings. My med was off by just 25mg. Changed it just that little bit and a whole new world. Got on the phone to the doc as soon as I knew this wasn't just the normal fleeting sucide thoughts. Tough go for a while, but made it.

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zombie
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09 May 2007, 6:47 am

Lazenca_x wrote:

:( I'm in a bad state at the moment. I'm so depressed that I cannot see the light at the end of the tunnel anymore. I might just end my life any day now. The funny thing is the fact that i'm trying to use my mind to find a way to end it. I have a bullet..... but I lack a gun. So i've told myself that I can build myself a gun using my skills. I'm sure I can do it :roll:

The ani depresants i'm taking aren't working as well as I had hoped. The thing is a part of me doesn't want them to work. I feel as though i've messed up so much

Dont do it, i know how you feeling a little down at the moment and its not a nice feeling. I find that WP can help me alot even just reading the posts. I dont know that many people here but it dose the job, another thing that helps with the blues is watching a movie, tv series and walking. I love walking in the mall that always cheers me up and going out places where there are a resonable amount of people. There is always a better way out.

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Mitch8817
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09 May 2007, 6:56 am

Remember; this too shall pass.

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Danielismyname
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09 May 2007, 7:20 am

I cannot stop thinking of performing seppuku; distraction is good for me...swinging swords ironically....

Kosmonaut
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09 May 2007, 8:05 am

i told you i was hardcore

postpaleo
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09 May 2007, 8:29 am

Lazenca_x wrote:

I feel as though i've messed up so much

See here's the thing, we didn't mess up. It's not our fault. It is our fault if we don't take advantage of what helps us. Call your doctor, they will make room to see you in person or have an idea about another med or a different doseage. Hang on there is help. You've already made it this far, you are a survivor. Don't forget that. I am a survivor too.

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Lazenca_x
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09 May 2007, 8:30 am

Danielismyname wrote:

I cannot stop thinking of performing seppuku; distraction is good for me...swinging swords ironically....

That's funny because I had the same thought just yesterday :evil:

Thanks guys for everyhting I feel better now. :roll:

Danielismyname
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09 May 2007, 9:08 am

Lazenca_x wrote:

Thanks guys for everyhting I feel better now. :roll:

What do you want?

Lazenca_x
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10 May 2007, 3:32 am

pie

Danielismyname
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10 May 2007, 3:42 am

Lazenca_x wrote:

pie

Need details....

postpaleo
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10 May 2007, 5:11 am

ice cream

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TrishC7
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10 May 2007, 5:26 am

This isn't something you need to try to deal with by yourself, and you're not alone. It's time to see the doc if you're feeling this bad, and make sure they understand that you're not in a situation where you can wait a couple of weeks for it. Someone said to me once 'suicide is a permanent 'solution' to a temporary problem' and it's true, though I hate cliches. I know how it feels, and hope things improve soon.

Lazenca_x
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10 May 2007, 10:34 am

I feel fine at the moment. The thing is, It comes and goes :roll:

Danielismyname
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10 May 2007, 10:48 am

Lazenca_x wrote:

I feel fine at the moment. The thing is, It comes and goes :roll:

Yeah...that's how it goes. It'll probably come again, but it'll go then too.

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