Upset with life

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I feel like things aren't going to ever get better. I've been working out more to try to improve my mood, but it doesn't last. I feel like I get bullied and mistreated all the time and I don't know how to respond to it . Then I get frustrated because I should know how to stand up for myself. I use to think it I wore nice clothes and did my hair people might be less likely to bully me, but it doesn't always help. Dating feels hopeless. I have almost no experience with relationships and have never even cuddled with or kissed anyone. Guys irl rarely show interest and when they do they loose interest fast or like someone else more so being in a relationship feels impossible. I feel like I'm going to constantly get bullied and felt sorry for the rest of my life and no one will ever love me. I don't know what to do about it. I feel helpless and sometimes it makes me not want to live anymore.

Life has a funny way of throwing your curve balls, but you never know what's next. Think of all the exciting possibilities that can happen. You never know, the right person could enter your life when you least expect it. Who is bullying you, what do they do?

It's been a lot of different people and I don't know if it's really considered bullying, but some people just treat me very differently than others. They act very serious and unfriendly around me and it makes me wonder what kind of vibes I'm giving off because it has happened with several different people There's someone at work who's currently bullying me though. They talk about me and invade my personal space like I'm not there, they say things under their breath and I think they are trying to turn other people against me too. I feel like getting bullied this way makes me unattractive because I don't know how to stand up for myself. I don't know how to think on my feet or respond. I feel like no one will ever love me. It seems like most of the guys who show interest are just lonely and don't actually like me because they lose interest so fast. I don't act desperate or anything, but it's like there's something missing in me that makes other women attractive to guys.

Sorry for getting so negative. I've been feeling more off today than I usually feel and I just feel tired of the same things happening again and again without knowing what to do about it.

It's okay, you need to get these things off your chest and vent. I'm sorry that person is inconsiderate. Well, personally the fact some jerk was bullying you wouldn't make you less attractive in my eyes, it would speak to character flaws of the person doing the bullying. So, I wouldn't think any less of you, but I certainly would think less of the bully. Just because you haven't met someone that you're compatible with doesn't make you unlovable.

OP If you're still reading this, you might have noticed that I made another forum on my suicidal thoughts today. I am not saying I am having the exact experience as you but I am also in a very bad place mentally which is causing suicidal thoughts. I am used to thinking very negatively in the face of bad situations (and even a lot of good situations!) and have done so for a long time, but as of now I am experimenting with thinking positively in the face of bad (and good) spots instead, hence why I am posting this to TRY and help you. Anyway the main point is I used to watch this video when I'm feeling depressed. It doesn't really work for me anymore but it did when I first watched it. No sure if you are interested in professional wrestling but hopefully it will give you a lift either way. Let me know if it helps.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bRmyFOUVGBc

Maybe try watching someone like that for a bit to see whether that seems to happen with everyone where he initially seems to show some interest. It is very possible he has merely stopped his *display* of interest while thinking you have lost interest in him...and maybe he will notice you watching him and then re-approach you.

^ Maybe that's part of it because I sometimes get the feeling that maybe I come off as uptight or stuck up because of the way some people treat me. Usually when I get the feeling that people are being rude to me I sometimes act like they don't exist. It's just how I automatically respond in those situations. That might make me come off that way more to other people that aren't being rude to me though.

I've also been told that I come off as really shy, which I kind of am, so maybe that makes me a target. I do try to stand up straight and be friendly though.

I don't watch wrestling, but thanks.

I feel like another problem I have is that I appear dumb to others and it causes them to feel sorry for me and bully me. This is something that I want to change for myself. I heard working out and drinking coffee can help you become sharper and feel more confident, but it doesn't always seem to help me. I hate feeling this way and I don't know what to do about it. I wish I could get more sleep so that I can function better. People say don't care about what others think, but it bothers me that I'm like this so it doesn't always have much to do with other people.

I also wish that I didn't let the way people treat me bother me. I don't know how not to let it bother me though because I can't always avoid them, I don't always know how to respond to them and they might also create a distance between me and other people because it's happened before. It doesn't bother me much when I know how to respond, or of I see them do it to other people, since it might just be their personality, but this isn't always the case.