suicide attempt at very early age

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ltcvnzl
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14 Apr 2017, 10:05 pm

I remember I tried to kill myself when I was 10 years old, I drunk every stuff I had in my bathroom because it was the only thing I could have access without nobody knowing and I hoped it would kill myself, it didn't obviously. Although I have many suicidal thoughts, I never had any other attempt, just a few times playing on the line with pills but I never thought it would kill me.



Ignotum
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16 Apr 2017, 10:26 pm

Damn, that sounds downright terrible! To develop suicidal tendencies at so young... I can't imagine what you would have had to go through as a child.

From a look at several of your posts (lol i'm such a lurker I know), it seems like you're going through some tough times right now... and if you were like that since childhood... then, well, my blessings go out to you and your struggles.

By the way, I don't mean to sound overly intrusive, but I'd always be open for a PM if you feel like you need to share your thoughts with someone, or maybe gain a new perspective. I know from when I go through hard times at least that it helps to get your thoughts out there to someone who is non-judgmental when you feel that you are otherwise surrounded by people that don't seem to care.



aloofdeer
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18 Apr 2017, 7:46 am

I had suicidal thoughts from a very young age as well and I'm sorry you suffered through them that young. No child should have to feel pain like that. I'm sorry to hear you're still having suicidal thoughts. Have you ever talked to a therapist or someone about your feelings?



ltcvnzl
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26 Apr 2017, 9:42 pm

Ignotum wrote:
Damn, that sounds downright terrible! To develop suicidal tendencies at so young... I can't imagine what you would have had to go through as a child.

From a look at several of your posts (lol i'm such a lurker I know), it seems like you're going through some tough times right now... and if you were like that since childhood... then, well, my blessings go out to you and your struggles.

By the way, I don't mean to sound overly intrusive, but I'd always be open for a PM if you feel like you need to share your thoughts with someone, or maybe gain a new perspective. I know from when I go through hard times at least that it helps to get your thoughts out there to someone who is non-judgmental when you feel that you are otherwise surrounded by people that don't seem to care.


Thanks.

It feels really weird because I can't remember a moment I was happy at the present – my memories of happiness are related to a promise of doing something and then things would be nice, then I reach a point where I actually got many of the things I wanted and felt unhappy, then I lost them, and now I'm even more unhappy and hopeless.

I feel I'm drowning in all my negativity and I can only talk about me and my dramas, and it's only worse things. Sometimes I feel my special interest can be my only suffering, because it's the only thing I still pay attention to.

Thanks for being open to talk.

Quote:
I had suicidal thoughts from a very young age as well and I'm sorry you suffered through them that young. No child should have to feel pain like that. I'm sorry to hear you're still having suicidal thoughts. Have you ever talked to a therapist or someone about your feelings?


I'm sorry for you as well. I didn't :/ I did therapy for a while (like two months, then I quit because I'm basically a serial quitter) and I really didn't found it comfortable to talk about anything – it's weird because I often talk too much about myself to anyone, in a level it is a bit inappropriate sometimes, but I didn't felt like this to the psychologist.



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26 Apr 2017, 9:51 pm

i remember in 2nd grade, we were given an assignment, draw us, and write about what we wanted to be when we grew up.

i drew a stick figure with x's for eyes, blood, and wrote "when i grow up i want to be dead"

and thus, i went to therapy, and got diagnosed asperger's :lol:


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