How do you let someone go?

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Hi guys,
Not sure if anyone remembers my last posts from a while ago, I don't want to go over old ground again but I don't want to just launch in without explaining so I'll give some background info. My dad died 2 years ago and my mum's recently found someone new. She's super happy with her new man but she hardly speaks to me anymore.

I get it, she's happy and she's moving on from dad and starting a new life. It was great to see her transform from worried/down to happy and glowing. Her boyfriend is a genuine nice guy and we get along fine, and although I miss my dad I don't feel any hurt/grief about it anymore. I understand why it's happening and I'm not blaming her. But for some reason I just can't emotionally let her go.


She used to call me every weekend or second weekend just to chat, and she used to ask me up for dinner. We would go out for lunch together or just sit around at her place or mine and drink tea. We'd often go on walks or to weekend markets. Now she does this with her boyfriend (which I totally understand). I live alone and work with all men so she was my main other female in my life I would see regularly. Sure, I have other female friends, but none I see regularly, like once a week. I talk with females about different things than I can talk with males about, and I know I'm 28 and should get a boyfriend and move on with my own life, and I will eventually, but how do I let go of my mum?

I've been depressed about it for a while but the thing that tipped me was that I do community theatre and we have a show on at the moment. It's which is super taxing and involved (and is giving me severe anxiety trying to cope with it and my full on job), and my mum come along with her usual crowd of friends and relatives but her boyfriend for the first time. She goes to all of the shows me and my brother do (he is in a band and I do different things as well as theatre) but instead of staying around after the show and just chatting about stuff like we normally do, not always about the show, sometimes just what's happening on the weekend, she just said 'yep nice show' and left. For the first time in my life I feel genuinely lonely.

At least she took the time to go to your show. That says she still cares. Im not sure what you can do about this. Maybe try talking to her saying you miss her and would like to hang out some time.

I believe you should ask your mother why she is so cold and abrupt with you.

She might not know the effect her interaction towards you has on you.

She's your mother....and you deserve better from her.

Thanks for the replies guys. I'm not doubting that she doesn't care, she's just got someone more exciting in her life. She's never been very emotional/emotionally supportive anyway.

Hmm, that has me wondering if it is more a thing of letting go of the person, or of letting go of the hope of what she could be.

Hey you know you're probably right. My dad and I used to have fights like crazy but up until a certain age he was my emotional support. Then it was various teachers or friends, and now I'm at the stage where no one's filling that role. I feel like an emotional parasite sometimes, latching onto people like that (this is not self-pity and I'm not after sympathy etc, I just need to get my thoughts out somehow).