I Want To Scream!!

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I been emailing my dad trying to get a better relationship with him, he blames me for my problems with my sister. He was talking like I woke up one day & decided to so mean to my sister., she started it. With my grandmother thinks she knows me & think what I can do like everyone else & my father thinks he know me too, it is sooooooo bad enough I have to deal with my sister. I want to scream, I want to tear out my hair, I don’t want to live anymore, I want to die, I have no one here to help me, no once that understand me. I feel like an outsider.

You need to ask for a social worker. Ask your dad to help you do it. Unless you get help I don't know if you will ever feel much better. I felt like you and I got a social worker and now life can still be hard but I have people like the social worker to help me with difficult things.

fifasy, this is good advice. My daughter started seeing a social worker, and it has turned out really well. I went to the first meeting with my daughter and we both were impressed with this lady's competence, professionalism, and genuineness. Now my daughter goes to see her on her own when she has something she needs to take care of, that formerly she might bring to me and I wouldn't know what was needed. The truth is she relied on me too much, but now she is learning that there are ways to get her needs met that don't involve running to mom.

So maybe Kitty, there are ways to take care of stuff that don't involve leaning on your dad any more. I hope this helps you in some degree.

I didn’t say I depend on my dad, last time he helped me was over two years. I don’t want his help anymore. I do want a social worker that knows about Aspergers & won’t judge me, I also need to find a doctor.

How might you go about finding one?

I been looking online, but I don’t have a best judgment all the time. I wish my mom was here.

Are you in the US? Contact your local disability agency and see what they can do for you. Good luck.

By the way, it's good that you know you don't have the best judgment. Just being aware of that fact can help you be cautious and thoughtful in your actions.

I’m from California

California Department of Developmental Services: http://www.dds.ca.gov/

It's a little dense like most bureaucratic websites. Take your time, try some links, make a phone call or two.