Ick, I have GORD/GERD too. Do the PPI medications work for you? They didn't for me but I know they do for many people. The only thing that helps mine is liquid antacid (I think because it's thick?) with milk. That stuff getting out of control can make you feel a bit nauseous.
I've been overwhelmed with stuff and hated myself lately too (and the weather is going crazy here too which doesn't help) and things seem bleak at this time of year but hey, it's all subjective. Things change, issues can be resolved, new perspectives can be found. It's no reason to wish yourself dead. You need to be alive to improve things.
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Alexithymia - 147 points.
Low-Verbal.