I need attention

Post Reply New Topic

I am very very upset.
I am very very anxious.
I have no friends.
I'm frightened I alienated my therapist by emailing her when I was upset and she did not reply and I should not have done it and now I don't want to go to my appointment tomorrow.
My parents are smothering me.
I read a book called autism and asperger syndrome in adults and now I feel like I don't understand my autism at all. I don't know or understand myself.
I feel stupid posting here because I don't know anyone here.
My account has been hacked or I am not remembering doing things or the site or my account is not functioning correctly and I am very upset about that.
I am sad I do not have self harming as a coping mechanism anymore because I haven't done so in years and now I am too squeamish about it and I can't do it but what else can I do.
I feel dirty and disgusting and shameful.
I am so upset.

Last edited by IreneAdler on 27 Aug 2018, 12:15 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Why does this stupid place show you how many people have read your thread and not replied. It's destroying my soul and yet I can think of nowhere else to go. I feel so isolated. I spend my life convincing others and myself i am not. I do not want to be pitied and encouraged to socialise with people I cannot relate to. Maybe nobody can relate to me. Why am I yearning for a person or people if I'm autistic. Because I need help. But nobody can or will help. Yet I have shown myself time and time again I have not the nerve for suicide.

Sorry, I nearly replied to say hang in there. I didn't feel like I was the right person to say anything. You know this place is pretty quiet during the days?
I'm going to read your post again and reply soon.

Hi Irene,

Are you a fan of Sherlock?

hope you feel better soon x x

I'm sorry that you are so upset,
I'm really hoping that some people will say something useful for you soon.
I would just urge you to do the things that help you to calm down.
Forget about other people for a while and watch something or do something that will help you.
The feelings that you are having right now will pass.

Most of the world is still asleep and hasn't woken up at the time that you posted. Literally.
You will definitely get more replies as the day progresses when people actually get on-line.
The view-count does not count the number of different people who read your thread but simply the number of page-loads (and this site is known to be very glitchy where some of us have to hit re-load a lot).

Hey, I live alone at this time, but I prefer it that way (due to the amount of «work» that I want/need to get done).
Mine apologies if I am not what you need (although I actually can relate as my life had been extremely isolating within my life's history for many years where absolutely nobody could «relate» to me, and I knew it, too).

I don't mind being your friend, for what it's worth, but it's also extremely important that I get the work done that I need to do for my own life's sake, because it could literally mean the difference between life & death for me in the future, thus I am quite limited in the amount of time that I can afford to allocate in interacting with anybody.

Reading books is good, and I've actually read hundreds of different titles throughout my life (yes, actual hundreds, not an exaggeration), but it's also been my experiences and observations that a lot of the «mainstream» publications are like the blind trying to lead the blind (i.e.: they, themselves, have no real answers). Just keep an eye out for other books or even sections at the library where the book-titles and reviews may prove to be more reputable, then you can sometimes find a goldmine-worth of information, helping you understand why the previous book is/was flawed. Good luck to your recovery, for you have already read at least one book after all, thus I know that you will be able to eventually discover how to successfully navigate through or even out of that psychological-maze.

Thank you all so much.

It just means so much to me that you replied.

I am still processing the replies but it means the world to me that you did.

What's the root of your trouble? Perhaps you need a new hobby?

Yes. I do like Sherlock, well I liked the first few seasons until it went really weird. I also really like Sherlock Holmes, the stories, the character.

Thank you

I think just having some replies and someone to message made me feel less alone. The feelings are not so intense now, but the problems are still there and I wonder whether I should pursue a career in education, or whether it is wrong for an autistic person who has self injury scars to teach small children.

I am in the uk, I guess I didn't think that most users are probably from the US. Most of the time I like living alone; I'm far more successful living alone than I ever have been living with others.

What work do you do?

Do you have any book reccomendations?

I am not entirely sure what the root is. There are too many things, and life is too wishy washy with no right answers and too many impossible decisions.

This will give you a chance to see how good your therapist actually is.

Read Bertrand Russell's Conquest of Happiness. You might find it a little intellectual, but it really has some neat answers on how to deal with the kind of existential angst that you describe.

I'm sorry you feel this way. Wish you much strength in your struggles. Hope you feel better soon.

I bet if you asked the question in a separate thread you would get some useful answers.