Worrying about upcoming social event

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In December I'm going to the works do for a Christmas meal. Don't get me wrong, I do want to go, and I've even bought some nice clothes to wear. But that still doesn't stop me worrying about it.

I am going with my boyfriend (he's part of the team too), but we all will be meeting at a bar first for drinks before going on to the restaurant. I am worrying about going to the bar, because I hate drinking, and that's what everyone will be doing for the first couple of hours. Plus it's on a Saturday night in a rough part of the town, where there are gangs and drug-dealers and your drink is likely to get spiked if you don't watch it.

The eating at the restaurant isn't so bad, but it's at a Chinese restaurant, and I've become worried about eating Chinese food because last week my brother had a Chinese takeaway and he was sick the next morning, and he says it was definitely the Chinese food that made him sick, even though the place he ordered it from is a high-rated place. I know it was probably a one-off thing, but I have severe emetophobia (fear of vomiting), so I feel scared of eating out now in case it happens to me.

I also feel embarrassed about leaving early (as in not going into another bar after the meal, which is probably what everyone else will want to do), because people think that just because you're young you should stay out all night and be up for drinking and dancing.

How can I stop myself getting so worked up about this night?

The only advice I have is don't drink. You don't want to drink you don't have to, no matter what everyone else says. In fact it might be worth skipping that part and meeting up with everyone else later.

Sorry I couldn't be more helpful. Best of luck.

I thought of you when I saw this article this weekend. It says that 25% of people younger than you don't drink at all! Staying in has become more popular in part because of social anxiety, and people would rather save money and play video games. (It also suggests some activities near the end that don't involve drinking, including Secret Cinema and late nights at the museums.)

https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfr ... ion-boozer

I think what we're both trying to say here is the best way to not get worked up about this trip is to try and make it a better trip for you. Talk to your boyfriend about it if you haven't already. Tell him what you want out of the trip and what you don't want, and perhaps you can reach some middle ground where do less of what you don't want to do, and more of what you do want to do. And for the love of god, do not feel embarrassed for not drinking. I went to Macadonia, a country where drinking is an important part of the culture and I got away with not drinking. My sister in law who is from the country, smoothed things over with her family, so they knew not to be offended by not drinking, and things went smoothly.