I feel like s**t all the time

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Im always anxiouse and depressed. I try to do things to make me happy. I go out everyday. On the weekends I dont go out as much to catch up on rest. I dont really want to go to therapy. I think it could be I hate living in town. Ive lived in the country most of my life and was at peace there. Or it could be my antipsychotic medication making me feel blah. The anxiety and depression isnt seriouse. Just enough to be annoying and make me feel like s**t. I dont know what to do to feel better. I was on a different antipsychotic medication once and I never gained weight. But it made me extreamly constipated. So Im afraid to switch medication.

Oy! I had it up to HERE with antipsychotic pills.

Sinequan - did nothing.
Risperdal - did nothing.
Haldol - gave me tardive dyskinesia
Lithium - turned me into a balloon
Zyprexia - made my mouth dry
Seroquel - did nothing
Latuda - gave me syncope
Abilify - turned me into a compulsive gambler and made me diabetic

I HATE that psychiatrists THINK they know what they're doing, but all they're really doing is experimenting. Hell, the clerk at 7Eleven can tell me, "Oh, Pill A didn't work? Try pill B."

@Sarahsmith - I hope things get better for you soon.

Yeah I dont want to be on this stuff. I would probably feel better without it. But my mom thinks I need it because we used to fight a lot. She said she wouldnt talk to me anymore if I went off it.

I also think my diet has something to do with this. Im not eating enough. Im not much of a cook, hate cooking! And cant afford that much. The soup kitchen I go to only gives out small portions. Not enough to fill you up most of the time. Same with the food bank.

But I did notice tonight that when I ate some crackers and cheese I felt less anxiouse. So I think my diet has something to do with this. If only I had someone to cook for me!

Can you get an aide from social services to help you with meal planning and cooking? In the U.S., they can come out to your home and help you learn these skills. It's impossible to be in good health if you lack good nutrition.