Don't Rock the Boat

Post Reply New Topic

When an adult critiques a child for indulging in bad behavior, they’re commended for it. When a child critiques an adult for indulging in bad behavior, they’re criticized for it. That doesn’t make much sense, does it? When my father was driving one of his friends to his house, my dad opened the window to let him spit something out. I murmured how it would have been more tactful to have spat into a tissue from the box we had in the motor vehicle, and after the ride, I got an earful for speaking my mind... courtesy of one of my younger brothers! What should I have done in this situation to avoid offending anyone?

He's your father's friend. Let him handle it.

He doesn't want his friend to be embarrassed. He felt like you embarrassed him. That's why he was upset with you.

My dad wasn't the one who scolded me; it was my little brother. I don't believe that anyone can be old enough to "get away" with acting immature; if anything, older people should uphold a higher standard than younger people, on the grounds that they should know better due to more years of experience. Personally, I would have no problems with someone correcting me about something, regardless of their age, so long as their criticisms are valid and they don't overreact to my questionable behavior. To me, this whole idea of "younger people shouldn't judge older people under any circumstances, because it's problematic and stuff" seems like just a dumb excuse for older people to act like reprehensible jerks, and worse yet, it can give younger people - like my father's friend's son, who was in the vehicle with us! - the impression that you can get away with anything when you're old enough. What if my father's friend continues this habit because no one had the gall to call him out for it? What if he did it at an important event or around an out-of-town guest, all because he didn't start quitting his habit long before something like that happened? I'm sorry if I'm overreacting, but it just reminds me of how my dad likes to spit on the ground like he owns the place whenever he gets triggered, usually because somebody mentioned someone or something he doesn't like. Did I mention that this is one of those things that seems to have a simple solution?

I do agree it was a gross thing that the guy did.

Your younger brother shouldn't have sought to "correct" you. It's sort of none of his business.

But I would just forget about the whole thing, and move on.