My boyfriend keeps being moody

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Lately my boyfriend seems aloof, like he's in a bad mood. He's off work for 9 days on annual (paid) leave, which I thought would make him happy to have a break from having to get up early and go to work. But ever since he's been off work he seems to be moody.

I've tried asking him what's wrong and if there is anything bothering him but he just says no. He says he's tired, but he isn't normally this tired when on a holiday from work. If there is anything bothering him I wish he'd just open up and talk about it. His bad mood is now making me feel depressed too.

He's an NT, I'm an Aspie, yet I'm better at communicating my thoughts and feelings than what he is. It's making me feel uncomfortable. He knows I'm a good listener, and he knows I will understand whatever is bothering him. He's still all loving and affectionate with me, but he still seems aloof and just moody, as in not laughing much, and being impatient. He keeps getting lost in TV programmes and neglecting himself (as in not shaving or bathing). I don't quite know what to do to help him if he won't tell me what's worrying him. What do I do?

Tell him you’re turned off to him when he doesn’t bathe.

It sounds like he's tired and burnt out from work, wanting to lounge in his pyjamas, be lazy and not be accountable for his time. I would be the same if I only had nine days off work. Maybe he just wants some quiet downtime without having to explain or talk or be questioned about his ennui. When I'm in burnout mode or when I used to have work holidays I just wanted to be alone in a silent house to do my own thing. I wouldn't want anyone questioning me if I didn't feel like getting dressed that day. That's how I decompress. Perhaps his preferences are changing as he gets older and more tired from work. Try not to take it personally, or to worry too much.

Maybe he is not ready to talk about it...in which case maybe if you give it some time he will open up. But if its concerning you, it may be something to bring up...like let him know you have noticed a change in behavior and you wanna know what's up or at least if he's ok.

I mean IDK in my relationship me and my boyfriend are pretty open...I mean if I noticed my boyfriend moping more than usual I would probably tell him I am concerned and want to know what is going on with him. I am sure he'd do the same with me. I mean perhaps you need to remind him that he can talk to you and you're there for him.

My boyfriend recently used some vacation days to take a 9 day long weekend, but I mean he told me initially he wanted to spend some time on WOW classic, so I expected he'd be spending a bunch of time on that. It would have been odd if he had just been mopey and playing on the game while neglecting hygiene and acting depressed. But he told me that is what he wanted to do, still took showers and we enjoyed having a bit more time together.

I mean I suppose what I don't get is my boyfriend just tells me things...like he told me he was taking a long weekend to spend some more time on WOW classic, so I expected he'd spend a bunch of time on that. I suppose I'd figure he'd tell me if he wanted a day to himself...which would be fine with me, I could go visit my mom or siblings or something. So IDK seems like we have gotten to a point where we wont really offend each other if we felt the need for some time apart.

But back to the topic if ones boyfriend just want to lounge around on a long break, I don't get why they wouldn't be able to just say that. I mean it is perfectly reasonable someone who works longer hours and such might want to enjoy some time in the home they are paying for.

He's not normally this moody when off work. And he's had enough time to himself because I am at work 6 hours a day, and when I'm home I have done my own thing (yesterday I went clothes shopping while he stayed home). I just miss snuggling up on the sofa or watching a movie together or having sex. I feel rather lonely when he's all distant and grouchy like this. He's had enough sleep.

Don’t know what to tell ya. If he’s still like this when he returns to work it’s time to talk.

It turns out he was bored because of not being at work. I half understand but half don't, as he seemed happy about having a week off at first. I'm worried in case he might not enjoy my company any more. I know I was at work but that is later in the day. We still had the best part of the day to do things together if he wanted to. I thought he'd like the idea of having a break from work. I love my job but even I look forward to a few days off. Maybe it's because I don't get bored, I don't know.

It's either a white lie or an excuse.

Could be anything. Lack of model trains could make me feel a bit like that.....

You sure he is am NT?