I'm so fat

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I am so fat nowadays. I'm naturally supposed to be a slim person but now I have to wear wider trousers/shorts to feel comfortable. Not only that but the tops of my arms are too fat while my wrists are thin. My thighs bulge out but my legs are rather skinny. And my belly looks like I am 7 months pregnant.
I walk 2 miles to work nearly every day, and by the time I get to work I'm sweating hot. I'm fit enough to walk fast like that without having to stop but I am not fit enough to go on my indoor exercise bike. All I do is pedal for a few seconds and I have agonizing leg cramps and I can't ignore it, also I'm puffed out, sweating hot and very thirsty, just after a few seconds of exercising on the bike! People say take it slowly at first or persevere through the pain but I just can't do that. I'm no good at persevering (might be an ADHD trait).

As for eating, well I don't have the willpower to diet. I'm like a smoker who hasn't got the willpower to give up smoking. I love my food and my drink (non-alcoholic), and I literally look forward to eating. I don't eat that much but I obviously eat more than I should because otherwise I wouldn't be this fat. I do have a healthy diet (I eat lots of fruit and vegetables), and I don't often eat big cakes or cookies.

I am caught between feeling upset about my weight but lacking the willpower to diet and the motivation to get in more exercise besides walking. Maybe I sleep too much. But I love my sleep too.

Do you drink soft drinks? If so, all that sugar will make you gain wieght. If you dont, my apologies. Im in the same boat. I look pregnant. I dont want to diet. That would be hell. They keep reducing my medication all the time, but Im still much fatter then before I started taking it. I dont know why Im not getting closer to my natural wieght....maybe Im at my natural wieght now, which is fat. And my boobs sag like an old woman.

At least you are walking and not over eating. I think you are doing a good job. If you cant lose the wieght try to love yourself for who you are.

Last edited by Sarahsmith on 13 Nov 2019, 9:01 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I'm right there with you both. I was skinny till age 37, got diagnosed with Lymphoma. Went through Chemotherapy and was put on steroids, I ate everything. Blew up like a balloon and never lost it, been this way for the last 13 years. I am undergoing weight loss surgery next month because I cannot get it off.

There are foods that help burn fat. You might not have to cut out the foods you enjoy. Just do a little research on what foods help burn fat.

how much sugar and fat can you cut out of your diet?

dietary fat on its own isn't bad, sugar is more so. but together and in sufficient amounts they are the lowest ring of hell.

i'm not sure sleeping a lot has much to do with it. if anything a lack of sleep is attributed to weight gain.

I wanted to add to this cause I noticed it too. Peanut Butter, Popcorn, and Mixed Berries with yogurt helped me lose some.

I'm sorry it's a struggle. My EF is awful, so a registered weight loss program and convenient group exercises classes is works for me. My husband and I both know how to maintain our weight; what I notice is that his "alarm" to do so is at a higher BMI than when my "alarm" goes off. So his yo-yo's are larger. Not quite sure how ones adjusts their threshold. Generally sleep is good for weight less (but like anything, it can be overdone). My husband increased his sleep to 8hrs and began to lose weight.

Wishing you find the key for yourself to change or accept this.

Sleeping a lot makes me feel lazy, that is why I blamed it partially on weight gain.

I eat popcorn but I was told it's fattening. Maybe it depends on what flavour popcorn you eat.

I tend to avoid some of the artificial sugared sweets or soft drink because it doesn't agree with my stomach. I don't overdrink soft drinks but I do perhaps have 1 can of coke in a day (original coke). I enjoy it, mostly for the taste. Diet or zero sugar coke doesn't agree with me, it tends to give me gas that is difficult to pass.

^^

I have an "unhealthy" snack once or twice a day when maintaining weight and once a day when losing weight. So if not a vegetable snack, it would be 100 calories of popcorn or a small sweet beverage (not both). I used air-popped popcorn (I made myself) to lose weight the last time I made diet my Special Interest. A handful or two (with some olive oil and salt); it was far better than the pretzels I had been snacking on. I gave up soft drinks long ago (although they are delicious!), my husband is finally realizing his once-a-day sugared drink habit is stopping his weight loss. (He exercises a lot but then "treats" himself... big. I'm not one to treat myself that way generally, although with my work stress up, my weight is up: I have been knowingly snacking on sugared snacks more.)

I did the Real Appeal program, which teaches a person to eat well (and exercise). It showed me I was not eating enough (protein, healthy fats) for breakfast. So I fixed that and switched to Whole Milk, Walnuts, Olive Oil --- healthy fats in small amounts. Our body needs healthy fat (and protein), not sugars. I wouldn't touch anything "diet" with a ten-foot pole.

Have you ever made diet and exercise your Special Interest, and counted calories (the former helps folks like us and the latter has a 60-80% success rate)?

I don't know about special interest as I don't really have special interests.

Another factor of weight gain with me is fear of wasting food. If I am given too much on a plate, I tend to eat it all because I don't want to waste any of it. When food is nice and hot I "feel sorry" for it if it has to go to waste and get all cold and rotten. I know there are some foods that you can freeze or keep chilled until the next day, but I'm talking about foods that you can't. Some foods can't be reheated twice or can't be chilled or freezed once it's been cooked.

Yes, I think food has feelings.

Try to stop drinking pop. It could be causing wieght gain.

Ah, I thought most/all ASD folks get Focused, Obsessed (aka Special Interest). Apparently, not so. I do, so I try to direct mine to "productive" projects from time to time.

How could you attribute different feelings to your food? That the food really, really cares for YOU and is willing to sacrifice itself if needed for your well being. You have the kindest, most loving food. Your food would be so sad if it were part of a past-full stomach and just stored as fat. Your food would feel so much better to be processed fully and in the best way, or it would rather have the opportunity (leftover) to do so later, even if it meant a bit of cold, and if there is never a time - it would prefer compost but understands that even the a landfill is better than being a fat cell, because your food loves you too and wants you to be well.

Pop is a Canadian/Midwestern word for what British people might call a "soft drink" or a "coke."

We New Yorkers call "pop" "soda."

Oh thanks for clarifying Kraftie

How much weight do you want to lose? What kinds of unhealthy things do you typically eat and drink, and how frequently do you have them?

Currently, the calories you're consuming vs the calories you're burning has resulted in the amount of fat you have on your body. The reality is you're going to have to change something if you want to lose weight, whether that be eating smaller portions, abstaining from or having less unhealthy foods or drinks, or doing more exercise, to burn more calories and/or consume less calories. What's more is you're going to have to maintain whatever change you implement, at least to some degree, after you've lost the weight to ensure that you don't gain it back.

It seems to be the prevailing opinion, and it's certainly my experience that diet is significantly more important for weight loss than exercise, so it's probably the best place to start.

You say you don't have the willpower to diet, but I don't believe that to be necessarily true. I'd say the only people who can't have the willpower to diet are those that enjoy indulging in unhealthy foods, and who don't care about what their waistline looks like. I think to successfully "diet", you need to adopt an appropriate mindset and approach. Different things work for different people, but what really helped me in terms of perspective was when I started looking at the foods I'm eating and drinking as bad habits, and knowing that once you change your habits and adapt to new habits, you're working from a new normal. Especially when you start seeing the results you want, there is little appeal in going back to old habits. What's also very important to me in my weight loss endeavour is setting clear boundaries about when I can and can't have unhealthy stuff, and how much I can have, because if I rely on just how I feel in the moment to make these decisions, I'm going to make poor decisions almost every time.

Earlier this year, I tried a couple of different things to decrease or eliminate my intake of unhealthy foods, and none of them stuck for more than two or three weeks, so I was getting nowhere. It's only when I implemented a particular approach that I started getting any traction, and now I've lost 18kg since the first of July. Had I not found an approach that worked for me, I likely wouldn't have lost the weight that I've lost so far.

There are many different approaches you can take to your diet to lose weight. For me it's been cutting out almost all junk food and unhealthy stuff except for having them a few times a year (for now anyway), but other people try things like keto. Others still just cut their meal portions, and many give themselves a daily calorie allowance, and count their calories to ensure they don't go over it.

Ultimately, you'll have to choose between remaining at your current weight, or making changes that will get you to the weight you want to be.

Good luck.