I finally did it

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Called the old man that thinks we’re friends. He is quite toxic. I didn’t realize this at first. And why everyone didn’t like him at the soup kitchen. I thought they just didn’t have enough love in their hearts but I was wrong. He keeps trying to get me to scam the government. He has been a total pervert to me. He never takes no for an answer. He will just keep pushing until you go nuts. He has to always know everyone’s business. And on top of that, he eats stuff off the floor. I couldn’t take it anymore and left a message on his phone saying I don’t want to be friends anymore. I said I would return his dvds he lent me next Wednesday at the soup kitchen. I hope he’s not mean to me now. It seems like something he would do. I’m nervous and dread dealing with him now. I have to eat at soup kitchens because I don’t have a kitchen and have to save money.

It’s sad that the man has to behave this way.

He could have been a man of wisdom and smarts who knows how to handle the hard life.

Instead, he’s just sort of a nasty guy.

He’s probably sad because he’s losing your friendship...but it’s his fault. He didn’t listen to you.

I don’t know whether losing your friendship would lead to his changing his ways.

I was thinking of this the other day. He could have been something. Instead he’s just a huge pain in the ass. But he probably has mental problems of some sort. I doubt he will change.

Take care of yourself as best you can and try not to feel guilty. You did your best.

Man I am not looking forward to this. I have to see the old man tomorrow at the soup kitchen. I said I would return his movies to him. I’m having anxiety about this. I hope he’s not mean to me! I should show up late so I don’t have to deal with him for a whole hour before I eat.

I'm sorry you're feeling anxious. I would feel anxious, too.

I hope he apologizes for being so creepy to you.

So here’s how it went. He couldn’t understand why I didn’t want to be friends. He said “well I’ll always be your friend and call you and be there when You need me.“ Then he continued to tell me I should scam the government. So I said I’m sorry I’m just not interested, and quickly moved to another table. So I’m like, there, that wasn’t that hard. But then after I ate and was about to leave he asked me if I could get him a cup of tea. (I used to get his tea and take away his dirty dishes when we were ‘friends’.) I said no, you will have to do it yourself. He was mean and yelled “oh well that’s decent of you!” Then I said his friend could do it for him and apologized to his friend for putting the burden on her.

I have a feeling he will be mean to me now. He calls all the other women at the soup kitchens b***h. So to him I’m probably just another b***h now. I’m scared to go to the soup kitchens now but have to go because I can’t afford to buy food all the time.

I kind of felt stupid for not getting his tea for him because he has a hard time getting around. But if he’s going to be mean to me just because I don’t wait on him then it’s like he’s using me. And he has other people that sit with him so I don’t understand why I would have to wait on him. That’s probably just his way of trying to lure me back in.

I'm sorry this all transpired but I'm proud of you for holding your ground. Is there a standard of behaviour at the soup kitchen? Is he allowed to call people "Bitcch" and shout at them for not waiting on him? My first reaction is that you need to report him to the owners or the charity which provides the food. It's unacceptable to me that someone in a charitable environment could be so rude.

Hugs

No you’re not allowed to harass people at the soup kitchens. He already got kicked out of one. The one he still goes to is more laid back but I could talk to them I guess if he starts being mean to me.

Update:
The old man called me and left a message on my phone saying the evening soup kitchen would be open tonight. (Which I find wierd because as far as I know all other church services are closed right now.) I got anxious that he called because I thought I made it clear I didn't want to be friends. So I left a message on his phone saying that I didn't want him to call me anymore and if he did keep calling I would get the police to tell him to stop. Which felt a bit extream but I needed to get my point accross. He has been a total leech so I can see him trying to weasel his way back into my life. The fact that I don't trust him not to be mean to me now says a lot about him. I should trust my gut. After all he was mean to me when I refused to get his tea last time.