roronoa79 wrote:
People who abuse others don't seem to care much about the damage they do to those they abuse.
Yet when the people they abuse damage themselves through self harm or something else, their abusers either get sad or angry.
Why is that?
(Trick question: the answer is that because when these people tell you not to damage yourself, it's not because they suddenly care about your well-being. If they cared about that, they wouldn't abuse you. They don't want you to damage yourself because it makes it harder to control you. If you desensitize yourself to pain too much, how are they supposed to control and intimidate you?)
Because they either downplay or justify the damage they've caused when they think about it, or just value their own interests so highly that in the moment they don't even notice the damage.
When others are harming the person they believe they care about they have a more appropriate response because the damage doesn't further their interests at all.
Even people who are terrible can still care for others so long as the costs to themselves are low. I wouldn't even assume the motive you list has to be true, since someone who's abusive and protective may view the protection from abuse from anyone else as a repayment for inflicting abuse of their own.
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The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.
They have a name for Nazis that were only Nazis because of economic anxiety or similar issues. They're called Nazis.
14 Nov 2020, 5:38 pm
