Joe90 wrote:
I work evenings, so by the time I get home I am rather wide awake and I stay up late watching TV or surfing the web.
Then by the time I go to bed it is in the wee hours and then when my alarm goes off at 9 or 10am I'm too tired to get up, so I reset it for another hour.
Then when I do finally get up I feel hungry, so I have my lunch, then do a bit of housework like laundry. By then it's afternoon and I like to have an afternoon nap because I always seem to feel tired in the afternoon - but it's not just an ordinary nap, it's a form of meditation that I do where I listen to an audiobook and fall asleep to it. It really clears my mind every day and helps with stress.
It gets dark at around 4pm now, so when I wake up it's dark and I don't feel like doing anything then. So I get ready for work then go to work.
But I've got things that need to be done, like cleaning and painting. There's mold everywhere and the place is becoming neglected, simply because I can't get myself motivated to get up early enough and do it. My day off comes and goes and I just end up sitting about sleeping all day. Even if I write a list of the things I'm going to do, I'll just ignore the list and say "oh, I'll do it tomorrow".
Does anyone else have this problem? Could it be depression? I do have a lot of valid reasons to be depressed about at the moment. Also I have ADHD, so although I find it hard to sit still I also find it hard to focus on a task, or I tend to rush at things and panic because I want to get back to doing nothing.
Working evenings or nights messes everything up. Your life sounds similar to mine pre-Covid-19, I was working Panama shift patterns 18:30 - 03:30. I've got suspected ADHD too (waiting for assessment) and I was finding it really hard to stay organised / motivated / awake.
You might be depressed as well, but you've not really said how you're feeling emotionally. Hard work for an Aspie and sometimes hard to work out, I know. But if you're feeling kinda ambivolous about everything - even things that used to bring you joy - or you're suddenly getting tearful or anxious for no obvious reason then get it checked out. The fear of not getting things done, or missing something urgent and important like a bill that's due, could also be an anxiety trigger.
For me, being depressed is like shutting down. I just want everybody and everything to leave me alone, and I don't really care what happens after that. Anxiety on the other hand is having loads of energy to burn but being unable to focus any of it.
The really dangerous bit is having both at once - surplus energy AND a disregard for everything. Be very wary of that.
I actually think the anxiety is more powerful for me. For that reason I no longer smoke, or drink anything with caffeine in it. That's made quite a big difference.
For depression I'd start with Vit D supplements at this time of year, lack of sunlight has a bigger effect than most people imagine.
15 Nov 2020, 12:02 pm
