Youngest sister getting enaged

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Hi:
I first want to say that I cut myself loose from my dysfunctional family members because they made me the black sheep and the scapegoat of the family because I have autism and because I was smart enough to recognize there is abuse going on. Several members of the family also don't know how to accept me or interact with me.

Being this is the holiday season, I have been feeling blue as I see just about everyone else gathering with their families or significant others. To make it worse, I found out through the grapevine that my youngest sister got engaged to her longtime boyfriend.


I am upset for a few reasons
1. I probably will not be at the wedding as one of her bride's maids or probably be invited at all
2. Though I have gotten along with her, she has not seemed like she is all that interested in me. Rather, she does things out of obligation.
3. I am envious of her because she is engaged, and I have had no one show any interest in me unless it is someone who wants to use me for sex. Not only that, I feel like just about everyone in my family seems to have someone but me.

Well. Sounds like a tough lot you have there.
Hard to give advice really. Also having ASD, makes me not that great at relationships too. So not the best person to advise.

I wonder if you wrote a letter to your sister to explain that you love her and would like very much go to her wedding.
Perhaps that would help. She may feel like you have distanced yourself from the family so are not interested in her?
I don't know and of course, i can not speak for her, only she can.

As for your own predicament with regards to finding a long term partner.
Perhaps you could try find one in an area of shared interest. For example. Intense interest / hobbies.
Rather than at the pub or a bar or a night club.

Joining a club may be useful for this. Others who are religious, often find suitable partners who share the same beliefs and values.

I think you would be more likely to find a decent long term relationship this way
than in other methods.

Hope that helps
cheers

I tried having a better relationship with her, as compared to my first sister. It worked for a while, but because my parents are selfish and inconsiderate, she too has been raised to be selfish and inconsiderate. I also think that it is my family members putting ideas in her head.

The last time I saw her was 4 years ago, after about 11 years when she and her friends from her job elected to do a road trip down to a neighboring state for a vacation and then stop by to see me for dinner for a few hours. However, she did not tell me until they were on the road, which was not fair because she had plenty of time to tell me. Being that I had not seen her in person since she was 7, I had really wanted to join her on that trip, but she said no, which neither my dad and I approved of. Though we tried to come up with something, it did not work out. So she came to my city as planned and we had dinner with her friends. Looking back, that whole thing was an obligation as she did not seem like she was happy to be there and nor did she look happy in the selfie.

I fell out with her over a year ago because she stabbed me in the back when my aunt died, with who I had a closer relationship than my own parents. It turns out that my dad has Parkinson's disease and she had thrown a few crowds-fund-raisers for him, which she attempted to keep from me. So when I found out, I attempted to share it, only to have her hide it from me. After that, I stopped talking to her. Meanwhile, she had the nerve to send a holiday card stating that she "Missed me," but I did not respond.

As for the engagement part, I confronted her which I did gently next to telling her I did not appreciate the way she and the rest of the family have been treating me. I am pretty sad being this is a big deal.

Not an easy situation. You could ask if she wants you there or not. If she says yes it is an invite. If she says no or says nothing then fair enough... But when you get married you then have the same choice.
You just need for the right man to come along!

I can relate to #3 so hard. I’ve just come to sort of accept it.

Relatable.

All of my siblings are married & I’ve never been in a relationship at all.

On the bright side, there have been many, MANY, people who just want to use me for sex.

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No for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.