Felt triggered and burned out

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Over the weekend I elected to visit some local attractions in my city and though I enjoyed most of them, there were some triggers that hit me really hard.

-One attraction had a video with a man proposing to a woman which made me feel angry and because I am not on good terms with my baby sister right now and I am not invited to her wedding next month.

- Though it doesn't happen that often, I saw a few couples holding hands at these attractions and it made me angry because I have never had a chance at having a significant other. Not to mention, I am jealous of my other family members because most of them have been in relationships

- I also felt awkward being a solo visitor at these attractions because it seemed like everyone else there had family members to or someone else to be with. It bothers me because I have been an outsider in my family for years. I am angry with my family because of this.

I also got burned out because some of these attractions were crowded and even with the mask mandates in place.

I am sorry that happened to you, Summer_Twilight. I honestly can’t stand to see things like romantic proposals in media and I had to turn away when someone at work was showing everyone her son’s proposal to his fiancée. I also don’t like seeing couples when I am all alone in public. I haven’t attended a family dinner for months now because I am the only one of my siblings who isn’t married.

My mother has also been hypocritical with me. She claimed that if any of her children that have kids of their own already had any more or if I had a child, she wouldn’t support any of us. However, my older brother and his wife had another child recently and she’s sending them thousands of dollars like she’s done for all their previous children.

The things your mother and family do to you really get on my nerves. Here they disable you like that but then let everyone else make bad choices.

It also makes my blood boil knowing how your family treats you. Do they even realize you have emotions?

They they don't care about my emotions and they have abused me just about every time I have expressed them. Whether I cry or laugh, they would get mad at me.

That’s horrible of them. That is emotional abuse right there. Hopefully they don’t guilt trip you for not wanting to be around despite how they make you feel unwelcome.

Yes, they sure have.
1. My first sister, who has some serious problems of her own has accused me of "Victimizing myself" and that I always start drama when it's the other way around

2. In the past, my family members have moaned and groaned about me not contacting them for things like mother's day, fathers day, and holidays. That said, they would only time to talk to me for five minutes while it's more important to get gas or cook food.

I stopped playing their games a while ago and believe me, it breaks my heart to see families together doing things as places like these attractions. I felt very angry and sad on Sunday and cried my heart out on my way home. That said, I have friends who live in the areas of these attractions and we can go together any time.

That said, I took a big trip a couple of years ago to an area where there were lots of families and couples together and none of them wanted to be bothered. So I felt lonely. Not a lot of my friends have the money for something like that, we would have to either save or start a crowd funding campaign.

I honestly haven’t even seen my latest nephew in person and he will be a month old soon. I just don’t like how I get pushed into the background at family functions and I am the only one of my siblings who doesn’t have children. I won’t go on the family beach trip and I especially won’t go on another trip my siblings and their wives sometimes go on. Without a wife of my own, I will refuse.

As I said, my family members never invite me on family vacations or family trips with them and especially if they go on vacation in a neighboring state. They always only have time to see me for an hour and then take off again.

I had other family members who drove down to handle my late aunt's affairs. Not once did they even call me to let me know they had arrived and really ask me how I was handling the whole thing. Rather, they went right to my aunt's house, connected with her power of attorney and handled her things. They also took a side trip to the neighboring state without me. It only when I spoke up that they got back to me and we met for dinner, which was great. It still hurt though.

I have called my family members out about this all the time and they don't seem to get it. I am either being bitter or I am overreacting. The other response is "I am sorry you feel that way."