Even though my sister had her son in December 2019, I still seem to feel as though its hard for me to deal with despite having put up already with his screaming, being fussy, not getting his own way and running around playing and so on as two year olds do. I still feel as though I'm a bad uncle because there were times when I wouldn't interact with him whereas everyone else in the family would happily interact and play and I still would feel uninterested. I can't understand why I'm feeling this way. I seem to feel that by seeing people like my sister in the late 20s and early 30s having their first child with their partners (even some people from school days are doing the same, one of which has aspergers) making me feel like life is becoming more serious and less enjoyable and it feels like life is passing me by because it seems as though my peers the same age as me or younger are doing these things because it is that time now to start families of our own even though I know that that is a part of life. I don't know if one of the reasons why I've been feeling like this is because I was used to me and my sister being single in our teens and twenties and having lots of time to spend being single even though my sister had more luck with relationships than I did (I had none) and that seeing her now as a mother herself is still quite daunting for me.
30 Jul 2022, 3:17 pm
