I feel like I'm destined to die before I'm 50...

Post Reply New Topic

A few years ago after i had my gallbladder surgery and found out I have fatty liver disease my doctor told me I was going to die from chirosis by the time im 50 if i dont change my eating habits and exercise more.

I did all that for a while and lost a lot of weight but when I moved back home with my mom I gained all my weight back and I recently found out I'm now diabetic too.

Plus with all the violence and turmoil going on in the US over that fascist bastard Donald Trump and his supporters determined to start a second Civil War to put their Dear Leader in power...

I don't think the odds are in my favor that I'm going to live a long full life.

And in the back of my mind I always worry about what will happen if the system completely collapses and I lose access to the medicine I need for my (very severe) bipolar disorder...

I feel scared.

we can't let ourselves dwell upon our fears, we must redirect our thinking to that which is helpful to us. for some perspective, be aware that humans en masse are well capable of making the living envy the dead.

I'm sorry that you are feeling down. I've been there, too. It's really awful. I think your priority here is your diabetes. I hear that if your diabetes is not severe, it could sometimes be reversed. Wouldn't you want to try and reverse it? It needs some motivation. When you feel down, you can't be motivated. If you can somehow feel positive about life, you will naturally be motivated. I think there are lots of nice things in life. You have your nice hobbies. Your life actually has so many nice things. Can you focus on those nice things that you already have or that are available to you? Then, you can work on reversing your diabetes.

There are two types of diabetes & type I is not reversible. We don't know whether the OP has that or the reversible type II.

Also, @ OP - the system won't collapse completely, it never does.

I think I have type 1 Diabetes. Type 2 is what they call Juvenile Diabetes, right?

I thought it was the other way around. Type 2 is the acquired diabetes, which can be reversed. The juvenile diabetes cannot be reversed. So, yours can be reversed by doing the right things such as good diet. Your health is the number one priority. Just focus on that for now.

I guess i got it backwards. I'm still adjusting to it and you guys are right i really do need to work on eating healthier.

I have a hard time with that because I love junk food.

I think I know what you mean. I got cancer a few years back and after treatment I got pretty healthy for a while. But now I'm back abusing my body, pretty much as unhealthy as I've ever been, not diabetic yet but doctor says I'm pre-diabetic and I'm wondering why I do this to myself. Being healthy was excellent, I felt good, my moods stabilised and I just felt a lot better about myself. Why do I insist on making myself feel so crappy with bad food, lack of exercise etc? Am I trying to die before 50? Do I not want to live?

I think at least part of is it is that I don't feel much optimism for the future. I genuinely feel like things are getting worse in most ways, and it seems like there's just too many people that are absolutely reveling in our societal and environmental decline for that to change any time soon.

I'm very sorry to hear that. I can only imagine how horrible cancer is and it's something i really hope neither I nor the people I love get. Actually i really wouldnt wish it on anybody...

And i can relate to what you said about not feeling hopeful about the future. People really have gone completely insane and it drives me insane. I can honestly say that the political turmoil in the US has not been good for my mental health. Even my psychiatrist was worried for me because she knows how these crazy extremists are not making it easy for people who suffer mental illness and need help.

The only thing that I find worth living for is my family and friends. I love them very much.

Also just so you guys know I really am sorry about the horrible things I said before about hating everyone and hopinf the world gets destroyed and that everyone burns in hell. I think i was having a psychotic breakdown but I think for now on when I feel myself starting to have those dark thoughts i need to just take a break from the internet and especially not read the news because it makes my thoughts worse.

I really am sorry guys.

In Type 1 diabetes, you have to inject yourself with insulin every day.

In Type 2 diabetes, you take pills, exercise, etc.

A coworker apparently got Type 1 Diabetes from having a bad case of Flu as a teen. And I'm 99% certain it's Type 1. Previously I had thought Type 1 was congenital. I guess the Flu virus must have seriously messed with his pancreas.

I have type 2.

Decided to do a card reading.

To the left I pulled a 7 of Diamonds and Ace of Spades. The Ace of Spades is a "death card" in cartomancy and the 7 of Diamonds represents karma. I flguwss it could be saying whatever end i face I will have brought on myself...

To the right I pulled a 4 of Spades and a reverse King of Hearts. The King of Hearts refers to me as everybody here knows im overly emotional and my emotions get the better of me every time... 4 of Spades could refer to thoughts of death and eternal resting.

Center focus card is the 6 of Diamonds. It means something about generosity to or from others.

Top card is The Sun in reverse. The card means joy and happiness but in reverse it's a kind of joy that blinds me to the bad things going on around me. This is the "alternative path"

Bottom card is Death in reverse. Yup... death. Pretty self-explanatory and in this position it means something i will want to avoid.

i am not so sure the doctor gave you the right dx, one tends to get type one in childhood. if you had type one you'd be having to regularly inject insulin every few hours.

No it wasn't the doctor it was a misttake on my part. My mom explained I have type 2 which is why I take pills for it and im supposed to eat healthier. I just got them mixed up is all.

you can ditch the diabetes if you can persuade your family it is top priority.