I’m So Exhausted

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I’m so physically & mentally exhausted, I’m so tire of crying, I’m not a little kid, I’m a grown woman, I’m going to be 53 in August, I Really Hate feeling like a kid again who need her mommy, but my mom is in heaven, I shouldn’t need her. Since I’m almost 53, I become the parent without children & I’m faulting BIG TIME, I’m faulting myself & I’m faulting my cat. I cannot find anybody to help me with cleaning my apartment, this makes me depress, hating myself, feel like crying, very helpless, cuz I cannot clean myself. When I cannot be happy, I can have trouble thinking right & being a responsible adult. I should buy new glasses by now, I lost my glasses around two weeks ago. I so hate feeling alone, even with family, I feel alone, nobody wants to talk to me outside of WP, only two people, Juliette & Tim, but Juliette has Covid

I'm really sorry that you are feeling this way. It's understandable. Can you try not to add to your pain by blaming yourself? It's not your fault. Blaming others also doesn't help us to feel good. I'm sorry I don't have an answer. Sending best wishes.

You seem like you're affected by autism or other disability. If you can't clean your home yourself maybe you need someone to care for you? Wanting your mum isn't immature. I lost my mum too and I need her desperately, for emotional support. I was so close to my mum and I looked up to her, she was like a best friend as well as a good mum. Losing her has left a huge gap in my life. I cry for her sometimes, especially when I'm feeling scared of all the bad things in the world.

Just don't beat yourself up about it. Have a cry, let it all out. And give your cat a cuddle.