How can I stop missing out on things I don't like ?

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I have explained in previous threads about missing out on things such as going out to social environments like bars, going to gyms and stuff and I seem to struggle to stick with my gut instinct to not want to do it and accept that I don't like these things but I seem to think that because all these things are around us in public places and advertised on social media and so on, it ends up re-igniting the FOMO (Fear of Missing Out) thoughts again.

To be honest, I used to like playing sports (football, basketball, trampolining etc) at school and liked going swimming with my dad and sister on occasions but for some reason as an adult, it doesn't make me want to go to a gym, swimming pool or whatever on my own initiative. I don't know if its because I'll be alone in doing it unlike when I was at school when I did with classmates and as I said went swimming with my dad and sister and not on my own. The thing is, this stuff is interesting as a pass time but I don't feel passionately interested in it as though I want to make a career from it. I am also someone who doesn't like wearing hoodies and tracksuits even though I know I can't wear a shirt and jeans in a gym. I also have few friends to do this stuff with and a few are autistic like me and more severe socially than me and not going-out types.

I seem to think that if I were to go, it probably won't be long until I decide I won't go anymore. I went to a nightclub once and spent the rest of night outside because I felt uncomfortable and didn't do it again.

Last edited by chris1989 on 29 Feb 2024, 12:16 pm, edited 2 times in total.

You're not missing out if they're things you don't enjoy, no?

If you enjoy them, do them.
If you don't, be confident in that self-knowledge.

It would seem that it isn't just the fear of missing out. You also don't seem to trust your own judgement, when is common in those on the spectrum. Most of us spend our whole lives being told we are wrong in all sorts of ways.

Why are you focused on things you don't like? Why not spend your time and energy on the things you DO like instead?

That's what I keep telling myself to do. I keep saying to myself in my head that I'll end up missing out on things I DO want to do if I keep trying to force to like doing something I don't like.

When I see other people doing sports or going to the gym as a hobby or career, I feel missing out because as though I'm wasting all the energy when I'm still quite young at the moment and that all of these people are making the most of it than I am even though as I said I liked doing things liked climbing things, basketball, swimming etc at school and on occasions with family but it doesn't seem to really interest me than other things I like to do like reading, writing, playing video games on occasions, going out shopping etc.

You could always try to get involved with some of those things again, to see if they still hold appeal.

Perhaps you feel like you're missing out on playing basketball because you genuinely miss getting to play basketball?