My mother makes me feel awful

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My mother makes me feel awful. I finally get my nerve up to make a phone call and she just brings me down by telling me how "standoffish" I am. When I ask her how I am "standoffish" she says "I can't fix you!" I wasn't asking her to "fix me" but to tell me what is so "standoffish" she can't do that either. I have undiagnosed selective mutism so bad I could not call 911 if I got hurt but she refuses to believe me.

it seems like your mother is not dependable to be supportive of you. a better idea would be to do what it takes to get a separate more dependable person in your corner, either face to face or via social media/texting. i got a LOT of help from my aspie meetup group, i don't know if you're on the spectrum or not but there are meetup groups out there in general that might help you.

You can text 911 if you are unable to call.

She's still at it too. She told me to "let her die in peace" and told me I need to get over this depression as if it's a choice. Well it is mostly her fault for not helping me with my special intrest or getting me to someone who can. "I called one vet. Sorry it was a misunderstanding Te hee. Now shut up and leave me alone and be greatful I called the one"

I am sorry your mom is dying, perhaps you can text her or go and see her before she passes? I would try and ignore the negative comments she makes. If it's too much, I wouldn't go or even talk to her while she is passing. She is making this choice to treat you like this than making it peaceful for herself to have a good relationship with you before her passing.