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Kilroy
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06 Sep 2007, 8:20 pm

Tommorow a pal (and his gf) wanna meet me (in the biggest mall in my city)
I only know him from online and this would mark my first online meeting
I am rather timid and not sure what to do...
should I wuss out or go
I can`t tell my parents they`d freak!
despite me beign 18...(I am not an adult in they`re eyes)
what do i do :?:



juliekitty
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06 Sep 2007, 8:31 pm

Go. It's in public, so you'll be safe.



Graelwyn
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06 Sep 2007, 8:31 pm

As said, I think you should go and take a chance, it would be good for you to face this now.
Stuff your parents, you are an adult and this is a chance for some real life interraction.



postpaleo
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06 Sep 2007, 8:33 pm

You'll be in a fully public place. Suggest a place in the mall that isn't over whelming to you to get to know each other. Be street smart, everybody on the net isn't what they present themselves to be. I've not had any trouble, but that doesn't mean I'm going to get stupid either. I have had an online gaming friend for many years, she finally flew east and stayed a week, it was wonderful.

Why would they freak? It's an accepted way for a single people to meet for the first time. In public places.


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Last edited by postpaleo on 06 Sep 2007, 8:33 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Graelwyn
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06 Sep 2007, 8:33 pm

As said, I think you should go and take a chance, it would be good for you to face this now.
Stuff your parents, you are an adult and this is a chance for some real life interraction.



Kilroy
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06 Sep 2007, 8:49 pm

my parents are VERY over protective people
they let my younger brother go and do whatever the f**k he wants
but I was "banned" from going down town
I may be 18 but they do not consider me anything close to an adult!
I have no life and haven't had a friend for 6 years
my first chance at friendship in a long time and its getting f****d up before it happens :(
why does nothing ever go well for me



postpaleo
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06 Sep 2007, 9:02 pm

Banned from going down town? You don't know how to lie? You don't get to go to the library and go someplace else? What is the punishment if you go to town? They going to keep you in the house? They already did that. It was like me in the Army and being a bad apple. What the hell they going to do? Draft me? They already did that, screw em. Use your head and guess what, it's exciting getting one over on the parents. It's the forbidden fruit. Enjoy yourself at the mall, you can do it.

Hell invite your folks on here. Good chance I'm older then they are. I'll give them a little fatherly advice :wink:


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Kilroy
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06 Sep 2007, 9:06 pm

I do anyways and said "its not your god damn buisness what i do" to my brother
I go where I like...though I suppose I could simply lie and say we met at the hobby store I go too :)
thats a plan...but I would rather be honest

my brother asked me if I ever met someone from online-didn't seem nosey-so I will tell him and he will tell my dad (I can't talk to my dad-I can't stand him)



postpaleo
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06 Sep 2007, 10:19 pm

Kilroy wrote:
I do anyways and said "its not your god damn buisness what i do" to my brother
I go where I like...though I suppose I could simply lie and say we met at the hobby store I go too :)
thats a plan...but I would rather be honest

my brother asked me if I ever met someone from online-didn't seem nosey-so I will tell him and he will tell my dad (I can't talk to my dad-I can't stand him)


Being honest is something I do try to do. It's so refreshing to be around those that you don't need to put up that "dishonest mask", the fake me that I need to project to get by at times. There have been times when for my own well being I needed to get something done that was good for me, no matter what the method. Yeah I did the lying junk to do the things that weren't so good growing up, I'm still no saint. But what you describe doesn't fit that at all. The real plan you need to figure out is to show your parents you aren't that image they still cling to. And you aren't alone, a lot of parents stunt the growth of their young and think they're doing it for good reasons. Sometimes it takes time to get to know one of the parents better, be able to relate to them and that can take years. And yeah sometimes it doesn't happen at all. In the mean time, have a good time and hope you write about it on WP, no matter which way it goes. Remember this when it comes to plans, KISS=Keep It Simple Stupid and don't repeat it very often or they get hip. :wink:


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Kilroy
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06 Sep 2007, 10:31 pm

I cancelled the meet-I just can't do it! :(
I can't do it because of my family is to overbearing, I am to afraid
so many things and I just said-no
my one chance in years I get to have friends and I don't get too...
all because the interent is an evil tool to most people :roll:
I feel so detatched from the net world...
Why am I doing this? :cry:
Whats going to come out of it? Nothing...
I feel so drained
thanks everyone...but this thread is rather pointless now :cry:
I sent the email...its over



TheMachine1
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06 Sep 2007, 10:35 pm

Kilroy wrote:
I cancelled the meet-I just can't do it! :(
I can't do it because of my family is to overbearing, I am to afraid
so many things and I just said-no
my one chance in years I get to have friends and I don't get too...
all because the interent is an evil tool to most people :roll:
I feel so detatched from the net world...
Why am I doing this? :cry:
Whats going to come out of it? Nothing...
I feel so drained
thanks everyone...but this thread is rather pointless now :cry:
I sent the email...its over


Not pointless. What is the real reason you think you can not go. Is it
just general fear and anxiety?



Kilroy
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06 Sep 2007, 10:40 pm

my parents would freak on me...
I tested my dad in saying "someone wanted to meet me in the past-but were in the wrong country"
he kinda was like OMG...
he would freak if he found out
I am 18 but nothing close to an adult to them
yes it is pointless-it gives me false hope and an illusion of an accepting world.
My dad says I can get friends but I don't want the friends he is talking about
I don't want the nerd types who, I really can't stand...
I want a chance to get a girlfriend and wont get that hangin' with nerds (I am not being mean I just have no urge to play Warhammer anymore) :roll:



postpaleo
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06 Sep 2007, 10:50 pm

Breath. There will be others. It's not like the one you planned now, can't be revisited later. Self doubt is normal, till you've done it a few times, then you start to catch a beat to it. It's nothing to beat yourself up over. Look at it this way, I had to. I made 3 attempts at college, no degree, I failed. Well guess what. I didn't fail, I learned something along the way. Sometimes we have to force ourselves into the fire. I can remember the moment when it came to me, I have to force myself. I can't tell you the age anymore, but it was a concious decision. And I was scared. I forced myself to get around people, shaking inside all the time. Now I eat NT's for breakfast, they don't taste good by the way. I coped an attitude, and I know where that mask is. Everybody shakes a little inside. "I wonder if I fit in or what are they thinking about me." That isn't the way it works inside them, they are thinking the same thing you are. Everybody shakes inside, then it starts to calm down, practice.


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Kilroy
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06 Sep 2007, 10:56 pm

Well man I dont wanna be friends with nerds and losers-and thats what my dad is trying to set me up with
I dont like these kinds of people
he gets mad if I get the slight bit choosy with people
I mean I am allowed to have to like people to be they're friends :roll:
Its come to a point where-I don't care if I have a future-any future where I am away from my parents ASAP will do



TheMachine1
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06 Sep 2007, 10:59 pm

If your parents supported the idea you would have absolutely no(or very little) anxiety about meeting these people?



Kilroy
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06 Sep 2007, 11:03 pm

yep...I would go with a smile on my face...