I wish I could be young again...

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Im 35 so maybe a bit to early to say that, but I am freaking out about getting old, I am going to lose my looks and my hair, and now that I am 35 I am more worried about it than ever before and I don't know how to deal with it aside from trying to hide from it. Idk I am scared of aging and I don't know why.

Like wait, no I am only 35 Im not even old, but like still I am very afraid of when I actually start to look old. LIke what do I do at 35 I already struggle to find employment idk if it really gets easier with time....but I am only 35 maybe I should come back when I am 60 idk I don't want to diminish anyones hardships and idk maybe some people are right that millennials struggle with maturity. Then again could be all the lead baby boomers exposed us to but no one likes to really talk about pediatric lead that us millenials were exposed to which for sure could have caused the uptick for autism and adhd. Like yeah a lot of us millenials may have lead poisening, might explain all the add and autism and adhd so called epidemics. like yeah some of kid grew up with still gross chemicals getting in us and yeah maybe it had an effect. They didnt actually ban led gas till 1994, Well I was already 5 by then so certainly breathed some of that in for sure having been born in 1989.I was a new 90's baby lol but idk if I for sure have autism I worry maybe I just have brain damage that mimicks it. and not true autism. Cause I was born in an emergency birth where I had the umbelical cord around my neck and I almost didnt make it but my mom thaat something was wrong so she callled them intodo the cesection for sure sounds like it was also traumati..ic for her like did she even get any aftercare? but I was her bayby and she was trying very hard to have me be a sucessful pregnancy and she got that but then was she reallly nice to me her first kid. but no she had another when I was 12 and guess who always got baby duties than any chance I had to hang out with peers, I already struggled enough but then having to take care of my babybrotehr so my parents could go out got annoying as it turned into I could never go out with friends cause I had to watch my baby brother at all times. I love him now hes an adult and is allowed to do his own thing and yeah I also get along better with him with him being his own person. But I was mad muy parents mad me skip so many coming of age events just so I could stay home and raise my baby brother while everyone else went out, like I got punishsed for my parents having an irresponsible birth. I wasnt his mom so I should n ot have been expected to be his mom at the age of 12 I was still juust a kid to. and no one likes to remember that part. I was going to delete all that personal story, but maybe I should leave it in case anyone else can relate it juust feels so cringy I dont like to leave it up. cause yeah why it it always on us women to fix our f****d up brothers or whatever, sometimes no matter what we say they wont listen is how it feels sometimes. so Idk why cant we just have our own yaht? how bought an all gender yaht with everyone gets thier own stall to piss or poop in within whate4ver gener bathrooms as like if women dont want to piss right next to each other men should get stalls to. As the current form sometomes forces guys who are not thet comfortable with each othert but they have to piss next to each other without a private stall...

I want to go back to 1997 and do things a *lot* differently.

I will actually try to be helpful and practical in responding to you.

I'm 65. No one looks forward to aging, but it happens to everybody. You will roll with it.

What you are really scared of is losing your looks. As a man, I can't speak to it personally, but I have watched how both of my wives aged over the years. Both of them were quite attractive when they were young, and they were well aware and proud of it. As they aged they kept themselves trim, ate healthily without starving themselves, didn't abuse substances (except my current wife is a lifelong smoker which shows in the lines on her face), got themselves back into shape after having multiple babies, continued to dress fashionably. A number of other women I know who I went to school with are still attractive in their early to mid sixties, again not 35 year old attractive but younger than their age attractive. Your looks will mature, but I think if you are an attractive 35 year old woman there is no reason why you cannot be an attractive 55 year old woman if you prioritize that.

I saw an article that says the two big factors are sunscreen and smoking.
Wearing sunscreen to prevent tanning will help you stay young looking.
Smoking will make you look old.

The trouble is is that you feel like you're getting old at 35 but when you get to 50 and see people who are in their 30s they look really really young

So now I'm in my 50s I'm appreciating being young because when I'm 70, 50 will be young

A couple years ago my friends said that if I dyed my salt and pepper hair I'd look like I was in my twenties.

I'm thinking of dying mine salt and pepper

Don't we all?

I don't know how much it helps, but I got my waistline back down to 24 inches! It hasn't been this thin since my 30s!

Lots of times I wish I could go back to when I was in high school so I can fix all the stupid things I said and did back then. I've done some good things in my life since then, but I can't help but think how different things could have been if I knew then what I know now.