Caution: Idiots Venting.

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Nairin
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27 Oct 2007, 7:49 pm

'Kay. I just have to vent, and I think I'd better do it here.

If you get tired of seeing this idiocy, it can be deleted.

I've been feeling really depressed. I can't say what's going on, but it's got me really really down. I feel like I'm an idiot and can't help anyone and everything that I try to do right leads me to a dead end. I feel so useless. I feel like I need to help out but can't. I feel like a pile of wet, maggot infested leaves. That's how I view myself right now.

It's not like I want to die, but if things get too far, I might feel that way.

Usually, I just eat mangoes or grapes and I get really happy. But this time, it's just not helping. I really don't want to feel like this. I know that it's wrong to be so depressed, but I don't know how to stop feeling this way.

I really just need to save myself.

'Cause it's unlikely that anyone can save me anymore.

There would be a way, I'm not saying it's impossible, but it's just going to be really hard. And unlikely.

I just need to let go of my emotions or something. They're holding me down.

That, and if there was a scale of -2- to 20 on 'understanding life', I used to be on a 3 (About a year ago or something). A couple days ago, I was -15. Today, I'm -35.

Sorry for acting like an idiot and ranting in your faces.

Please have a better day than me.

'Cause I'm a worthless idiot.


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Tim_Tex
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27 Oct 2007, 7:59 pm

(hugs Nairin)

Tim


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Ana54
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27 Oct 2007, 8:25 pm

The part of you I sdee is not a worthless idiot. Why? Because I say so.


I support you in helping yourself. You still felt like people would be able to help you a least emotionally, which is why you posted this. If you ever want to talk-- about anything-- you can PM me. :)



Spot17
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28 Oct 2007, 1:24 am

Sorry you're in such a bad place; I've been there and wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. Is there something that triggered you into feeling this way?



javier
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28 Oct 2007, 6:34 am

If you stretch your arm forward, you will be able to tap my shoulder because I am just a few steps ahead of you coming back from the depths of hell.

This is for you:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nTV1pTYhsKs[/youtube]


I haven't learn to set the music yet, it will come. (but has you noticed the little warm hug at the beginning?)



Nairin
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28 Oct 2007, 8:21 am

*hugs everyone*

Image


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Nairin
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28 Oct 2007, 6:14 pm

Nairin wrote:
I really just need to save myself.

'Cause it's unlikely that anyone can save me anymore.


Well, that was a complete lie. (And I don't lie)

Because someone did save me.

I'm not depressed anymore.

Sorry that it seems like I'm totally avoiding what caused the depression and what's causing the okay-ness now. But it would take way too long to explain and I would bore/confuse you to tears. And I don't like making people cry.

Thank you all for talking to me when I was depressed. I just expected people to read it and walk away when I started writing, because I just felt like venting.

WrongPlanet people = Awesome.

Have a nice day.


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"...The heart's desire is found... in an unexpected place..."

Tailchaser's Song" by Tad Williams


javier
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29 Oct 2007, 3:43 am

Now that the clouds have lifted, I feel myself allow to tease you a bit,


Nairin wrote:
'Cause it's unlikely that anyone can save me anymore.



I don't know what your books say, but in mine unlikely has a completely different meaning to impossible.


But of course you end up getting right the most important point


Quote:
(And I don't lie)



You see, you didn't lie

Glad that you are better now

I am happy because people like you exist.



Ana54
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30 Oct 2007, 10:42 pm

Btw, I know exactly what you mean by feeling like a wet soggy pile of leaves... absolutely worthles in all respects. I've felt like a corpse before. A corpse with no blood, and the brains cut out. I feel better now and I'm glad you do too!