Memory...

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No idea where else to place this but figuring as how much it upset me I'll post it here. I've recently (as in yesterday) figured out a major gap in my memory. Not a time gap, although I do have that... as I say to my friends I spent the early 90's drunk. It was one way to deal with being "different." Oh..back on topic. Sorry 'bout that.

I've near perfect recall with the occasional days or weeks of true photographic memory(which are always greeted with screaming headaches so I'd like to not have this thank you very much). What makes this so damn disturbing to me is that I never remember what the people look like. They are always remembered as a sort of amorphous form with the attachment that stick to the person. I can describe everything else in complete detail. The colors of the furniture, floors, windows, ceilings, everything else. Except for the people. For example, a conversation with my friend Paul would end up with me remembering every word and the entire room but for him, all I'd see is a bit of orange string. (don't ask why Paul is a bit of of orange string, I don't know and I'll never tell him that this is what he is in my head).



Edited because apparently I'm living in different tenses also. grrrrr I hate when I do that.

I have trouble picturing the faces of even my family members in my head. Once I've seen someone many times, I'll start recognizing them when I see them, and if you show me a picture of my dad, I'll easily be able to identify it as my dad, but if I try to close my eyes and picture him in my head, all I get is audio. I can remember his voice perfectly, and I can remember stuff he's said and done. I can picture objects in my mind, like the toy chest he built me when I was a little girl, and the car he drives, and the sign on the building where he works, but I can't picture his face in my mind to save my life. I've always been like that. It's not just you.