Breakdown.

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I currently feel more autistic/inhuman then ever.

My parents say I'm not emotionally attached to them, nor to my brother and sister. This because of my nonchalance towards them. Problem is; i really feel like i don't have any emotional attachment to any of my family members.
When i express concern for anyone, it's always my first instinct because i the social environment forces me to do this.
However, i only have this instinct when it's a friend that has a situation. I don't 'receive' this feeling when it's a family member.
Example: Last Friday, my mom fell on her face and broke her nose. She went to the emergency and when she came back, i was passive, didn't seek contact with her, didn't ask her how she was, didn't try/want to help her. All because i never felt the urge to do so. When this would happen to a friend, I would do all the above. But if i think about it now, it would just be because i feel that's the way to handle these things, not because I'm truly concerned for that friend.
My theory behind this is that i can express care and concern for friends because it has been taught to me by unspoken social rules. While I've never really been taught this as a child towards my family. My mother told me she never did so because of how i was as a child. (I didn't see anything except for me and my feelings, my thoughts, my wants.)

I don't understand it, my life was going perfectly, i have good friends (with problems here and there but still), i have a girlfriend, i thought i had "overcome" my autism by learning...
Turns out i still have the same autistic traits as before, the only difference being that I'm aware of them now.

What the f**k am i? An coldhearted egocentric, egotistic machine?

Am i the only one having such thoughts?

I feel distant from my family too. As with you, I will make the effort to be nice with friends (and people do generally think Im nice, but it is a real effort, not natural), but I dont generally do this with my family (although starting to now). I do care about them, but in a distant way. As I child I never considered that I loved them or them me and it didnt bother me, even though they are a perfectly nice family. In fact often in my daydreams I just get rid of family, I dont like to think of the obligations I have towards them and the thought of them caring about me (which I know they do) makes me uneasy rather than reassured. It was only on moving away from home that I realised that I did love them to some extent, but I can easily go a year without seeing them and without missing them.

If you are in your teens or early 20's, I think it's hard to feel close to your family. I didn't start feeling close to mine until my 30's. I don't think it's all because of autism.